errrmkl46
United States
Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML
Anonymous
San Francisco, United States
Gross!
Today, I was waiting in a line, texting on my phone. I hear what sounded like a sneeze and said, "Bless you" to the man in front of me. He gave me a dirty look as I began to smell something awful. It wasn't a sneeze. FML
SierraDiaz2097
Vardaman, United States
Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML
Anonymous
United States
Faulty plumbing
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
DogStew
Behave yourselves
Today, I got sneezed on by a fully grown man. FML
coleslaw
United States
Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML
Concussed
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
Australia
Bad start to the day
Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML
race
Australia
Today, I was in a meeting and someone behind me sneezed really loudly. As they were doing so, I felt something cold land on my neck. FML
Loney
#blessed
Today, I had to let my nosy landlord into my apartment to ensure I didn't have an unapproved guest over. Why? Because she overheard me sneeze, and then bless myself. FML
Anonymous
Hillsboro, United States
Today, while putting a water bottle into the fridge, I suddenly had to sneeze. The force of my sneezing propelled my head against the open fridge door, causing a gushing wound to my forehead. Bless me. FML
Top comments
nokillnobeepbeep 0
Did you say thank you? Don't be rude now.
amatayo 0
how did he have your cell phone number? making up stories to get on fml is lame.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (186)
Stumblebum30 5
if he's so creepy why does he have your cell phone number?
Psychs7 11
He probably has her number because hes her neighbour and if she gets burgled or her house is on fire i assume she would want to know if she was out the house at the time
Panther_fml 0
sorry... but that is stupid. Why would she give her "creepy old neighbour" her number??? I would rather give a friend my cell number... Who cares though. This FML is fake!
bms1996 12
burgled?
PleaseSayTheBaby 0
Well... next time ask him to join you. if you don't he will rape you sooner than later.
bittersweets 2
Well that's actually pretty nice of him. My walls are quite thin, too. I can hear my neighbours fight, have sex... maybe I should congratulate them on their next ****** via text?
nikkers 0
I can hear my neighbours bumping uglies too... so clearly as well. I solved my problem by going in the garden and screaming along with her ''******'' they either keep it down or bought her some sort of gag. IDC which
nixipixio 0
Do it
lauryn_lovely 12
#67 thats so PRO
drdingus 27
Sounds like a plan!
Stumblebum30 5
#12 that doesn't even make sense for one. Two, they live right next door...walk over.
Psychs7 11
No you misunderstand, i mean if shes out the house at the time, he can knock on her door as much as he likes if she's out she still wont answer it. We gave our neighbours our number incase of an emergency while we were on holiday, and they kept it when we got back, of course our neighbours weren't creepy.....
baby_gurl2405 0
and why did your creepy old neighbour have your cell number??? and btw maybe you should get a life and ignore stuff like that... and lock all doors and windows.... :S
schnikerdoodles 0
Atleast he's concerned
CheapoBilo 0
Fake as hell.
jjcooper 0
I smell a stalker...
Whydoyouask 11
Question: Why does he have your number!?