Today, I had my wisdom teeth taken out. I vaguely remember telling the doctor that I'm a virgin. Several times. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. Under anesthesia I told the dentist my entire love life and drug history in detail. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth taken out. The two male doctors told me they'd give me anesthesia, but when they did, I could still hear them. I heard them talking about my breasts and how flat they were for a 17 year old. FML
Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. The local anesthesia worked on three of the four teeth. I found out about the last tooth when the dentist was mid-yank. FML
Today, I had all of my wisdom teeth removed. After the anesthesia wore off, I asked how long the procedure took, and the nurse told me a little less than an hour. Apparently I thought this was hilarious and started laughing, which ripped my new stitches. FML
Today, I faced my fear of needles and had my wisdom teeth extracted while awake. On the last tooth, I heard a loud crack. The root broke off in my jawbone and had to be drilled out. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to get my wisdom teeth removed. The surgeon took a better X-ray to see what he was dealing with before he got started. When he came back into the room, he started to laugh and told me it was my lucky day because in the X-rays he found 2 big extra wisdom teeth. FML
Today, I went to get some teeth pulled. I had Novocaine in my gums and lip so I couldn't feel a thing. When the doctor is pulling out the last tooth, he sneezes and pulls the tooth out. He looks in my mouth and I hear, "Oh, shit..." I now have stitches in my mouth. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. Apparently the medicines don't work on me. I woke up in the middle of the surgery and felt EVERYTHING. One of the nurses asked if I was okay, and the doctor just kept saying "Don't worry she's just dreaming", while tears were pouring down my face. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed and took the pain medicine that the oral surgeon prescribed for me before bed. The pain actually did go away for the most part, until my stomach decided to betray me and make me throw up, forcing my jaw to open more than it could after surgery. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ClassyCommando 13
Then the doctor looks at you sideways and says, "Not anymore..."
Kgirl2cute 6
I'm sure he's heard people say much worse things under anesthetic - at least you weren't describing your sexual experiences?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (117)
Kgirl2cute 6
I'm sure he's heard people say much worse things under anesthetic - at least you weren't describing your sexual experiences?
ocramavaf 15
not necessarily, she could have done all sorts of other things without having sex.
Kgirl2cute 6
Well I meant that at least because she's a virgin she couldn't have been describing her sex life.
gc327072 31
10- well ok then, Bill Clinton.
sens3sfailing 25
well I guess she tachnically was describing her sexual experiences, or lack there of, but still...
lilhellian 27
10) Bl
lilhellian 27
Sorry i hit send by accident. 10) Blow jobs (mouth,) hand job (hands,) I forgot name for using feet.. point is everything but doing it in the ear is considered sex/foreplay.
egrudy 9
Hopefully after her procedure she's still a virgin.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
44- I think the term you were looking for was "foot job". Sounds pretty disgusting if you ask me.
BrimfullOfAsher 20
Just be careful what you say when you're on the pain medication after the extraction. Seriously, feel better.
sens3sfailing 25
60-I don't have a foot fetish but when I was fooling around with my ex we just tried a foot job to see what it was like. It's actually a fairly good feeling but the fact it's her feet doesn't turn me on so it wasn't like we were all into it and stopped after about 10 seconds. It wasn't disgusting though, just like hand jobs aren't gross when you don't have a hand fetish.
sens3sfailing 25
Okay, sharing experiences to enlighten people on a topic and to share my opinion, apparently a no...sorry for not jumping on the bandwagon of everything foot related being gross.
JocelynKaulitz 28
Maybe she was talking about being a "virgin" surgery wise. She may have never had surgery before and this was her first time. But if not, you can still probably save yourself with that excuse.
DWilliamson 7
Nucking futs!
Marrach 7
******* fail... Oh look! I swapped the first letters around too!
DWilliamson 7
You cursed. You need to say to yourself "im a terrible person...and i should die!"
AF_wife 3
It's a line off of an awesome movie. Dickie Roberts. Obviously you haven't seen the movie. Fail
DWilliamson 7
Nope. Im not fail, im cool
wannabesinger 16
Geez what's with all the Dickie Roberts hate?
lilhellian 27
The comment was a fail.. This whole thread following the comment is a fail.
DWilliamson 7
Fail everywhere. And with this, gadies and lentlemen, i bid you niggas adu. And testicles
ClassyCommando 13
Then the doctor looks at you sideways and says, "Not anymore..."
yankfan89 27
I think OP would have been ok with that since she kept hinting.
onlychildFTW 34
The renters hears crazy things when people are under. So don't worry about it OP.
Inheritance 10
HA! I get what you did there 3, because she's having oral work done.
zack11742 7
Only with the Toby McGuire face
BunchieRules 31
68 - I'm pretty sure 3 was saying that because she got put under anesthesia, not because of the "oral work". At least, that's what I gathered from his comment.
Inheritance 10
I got that also, but god for bid my dirty mind goes and wonders!
teresee 8
Maybe he got the hint ... If you know what I mean ;)
thepunman 11
Ew
martin_martian7 11
Being a virgin isn't to mainstream
Silent_Thrill 17
Yet making stupid comments sadly is...
Razi_tail 25
That's the sad thing about our generation today. We have so many teen pregnancies because of all the "mainstream" things going on.
TheSithAssassin 15
We have less. We just hear about them more.
botanistjessica 24
Exactly, 70. People don't seem to remember that at one time in history, women were expected to have children by age 18.
martin_martian7 11
I mean being a virgin ain't a bad thing!
Dinger1992 3
Its not the worst thing you could have said so don't feel to bad, you virgin
laurenlovesjb 20
I'm sorry OP, I've said some pretty crazy things under anesthesia many times! I'm sure the doctor is used to it! Don't sweat it:)
lilhellian 27
You probably told him you want to be like kristen stewart, but married to justin beaver.
ManInTheMachine 20
Okay, I can't take this immature horseshit any more. SO ******* WHAT is laurenlovesjb likes Justin Beiber? Is it any of your ******* concern? How old are you guys, because you're acting like middle schoolers. I'm sick of replies to her that say: "I thumbed you down because you like Justin Beiber." "Eew, you like Justin Beiber." And all of the Justin Beiber bullshit. Most of the time her comments are coherent, smart and kind, which is more than I can say for a lot of commenters on here. Her preferences have nothing to do with her intelligence. Get the **** over it, you guys are ridiculous.
X_Codes 11
From what I understand, it's rare that the crazy things you say under anesthesia are actually coherent, anyway. It's like drunk sleep talking. On top of that, OP probably had her mouth propped open so the doctors could get at the offending teeth to remove them, so while she may have said "I'm a virgin," it probably sounded more like "Iee aah errrin" to the dentist.
gracehi 33
I admire Lauren's stoicism in all of this. I don't think I've ever seen her betray any hurt or anger, or lash out at anyone, even when they deserve it. She just lets her haters expose themselves as the immature assholes they are. Lauren's a pretty cool and classy young lady in my book... Even if I don't agree with her taste in music and men.
TotallyAradical 14
I won't lie; I've caught myself humming along to JBs new songs. I'm not ashamed!!
lilhellian 27
MITM I hate his music NOT him. As for kristen, all who says she's emotionless, do not realize she plays a socially awkward teenager. Honestly part of that came from a crappy mood, if I could take it back I would.
botanistjessica 24
Because having a crappy mood is a good excuse to belittle a stranger.
lilhellian 27
87 I know I already wish i could take it back. :( I wish a mod would moderate it for me.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Getting my wisdom teeth out was one of the most painful things I've ever gone through, especially since I had 7. It was more invasive and I was a wreck afterwards. :/
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Meant to also say that I feel for ya, OP!
Stealthed 8
You had seven?! You're a shark, aren't you?
whiteboy896 9
7? thats ******* crazy...
perdix 31
#11, getting my eye teeth pulled was worse than the wisdom teeth. Try to avoid that.
Welshite 40
#24: You must have really taken those vampire anonymous meetings to heart. That, or you took the idiom "give your eye teeth for something," seriously. I'm going to go with vampire, though.
zingline89 18
That was not very wise. I feel there's molar to this story. I think you should see a shrink so you can get to the root of this problem.
carminecris89 13
Don't worry, when I was being knocked out to have mine removed I told them I was going to be sick and then kicked my shoes off. I'm sure they have seen worse.
ballettillidie 8
My sister did the same thing... Then shouted let's have a bond fire right here right now