Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend asked for a picture of my penis, so I sent her one. Then later on, she asked for one when I was hard, the first one I sent I was hard. FML
Recognize this?
Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML
Today, I got a new smartphone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, my girlfriend of ten months sent me a picture message of her making out with a guy. Under it, it read, "You can pick your stuff up in the morning." FML
Busted
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML
Top comments
ysomad 0
wow you're a loser
bugwub 0
win for her!
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Comments (261)
waswashere 0
slay
archzinno 0
it must have been unimpressive
ulicksam 0
Showing her left ring finger on her left hand? Really? By the way, she has more reason to say FML for your text than you do of hers. You're pretty lame.
torodeoro 0
I proposed that same day, she cried and said YES YES YES!
torodeoro 0
Don't worry guys, I proposed that same day
torodeoro 0
dont worry bitch, I did. 5 G's SUCK ON THAT!
ck0251086 0
when you say that it makes me think your sleeping alone and wish you had $5 to spend on a ring!!! GET REAL
FlashBurn 13
So you'd consider sex but not marrying her? You totally deserved it. She had an awesome comeback though, admit it, lmao!
reddwarf_fml 0
lmao. that's greatness
volleyballchick9_fml 0
wow
goatmanjizz 0
bro. cum on her ear hole
GameAddikt 0
wow, you got owned!