Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend asked for a picture of my penis, so I sent her one. Then later on, she asked for one when I was hard, the first one I sent I was hard. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML
Today, I got a new smartphone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, my girlfriend of ten months sent me a picture message of her making out with a guy. Under it, it read, "You can pick your stuff up in the morning." FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML
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Top comments
ysomad 0
wow you're a loser
bugwub 0
win for her!
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Comments (261)
ysomad 0
wow you're a loser
mamamiaaa_fml 12
yeah. and win for the GF. you need to listen to single ladies.
andrewshields20 0
lmao!! it's a trap run!
KingDingALing 9
Like I've always said, "When in doubt, whip it out."
Shaebug12 0
that's rely rely funny
StoryOfTheYear 15
Ahaha! ha.. haha.. heh, um what am I supposed to be laughing at D:
Bees_fml 0
"If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it." But what if the finger's not the part that I like?
generalasskicker 12
win^^
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
fap?
dariuz 0
lol 26
emilisaurus_rawr 0
lmao I honestly agree with her... if you can't pop the question she shouldn't have to help you pop it up ;D Kay that was a bad one but my pint was made :$
Astroman129 7
Ugh... guess I misinterpreted the FML here. I thought she was comparing the size of his dick to the size of her ring finger.
austanyo 0
Well I always say sex can wait, ********** and if not, don't be a fool, wrap your tool anyways.
RatRodInk 0
whata kill joy
tboydlong7 0
marry her then... she is happy u r happy, not the best fml
WhiiT3TiGeR 0
160, I thought that aswell.
chicagolady 3
Put a nuva ring in it ;-). Two birds with one stone.
thekidownz 0
sexy rawrrr
musicchick1712 0
I'm sorry but your picture disturbed me for life -shivers- I still don't even know what it is lol
peece 0
Lol ftw
gogreen8856 0
smart girl
Mischief109 11
29) Rely? Is it rely funny? What are you? 12??
Hiimhaileypotter 53
#255: Don't insult 12-year-olds xD
kylo_117 17
Get over yourself
goodlike_fml 0
so?
kikibisweet 0
If you like then you should put a ring on.
ImaBmyLonurTees 0
how is this an FML? this is ******* stupid
nahgemoohc 17
Yeah!!! Op, I think your GF just proposed to you!
Ashamed_Sister 60
If you think your life sucks after such an invitation to propose then I feel sorry for you - and for her too.
bugwub 0
win for her!
StitchMeUp_fml 0
exactly! >.<
safaeita 32
like a boss haha
ClickMyPicture 0
She was going to shove it up your ass?
THEMTCHELL 0
how did you come to that conclusion?
mojojojo19 1
agreed, someone is obviously too young to understand! Lol
MooMofo 3
-_- i'm pretty sure that was sarcasm, people...
ClickMyPicture 0
No shit it was sarcasm.
roketkween 0
looks like you would enjoy that wouldn't you
BritishHobo 0
Who is too young to understand what the ring finger is, but old enough to know that some people enjoy sticking their fingers inside other people's anuses?
xkittykatx 0
She wanted a ring!
ImTheAlpha 30
I clicked your picture... :o
Zmeilerr 22
Can you say DIVORCE?
Yeah_Thats_Me 0
No I have a lithp. Thankth a lot! *runs away crying*
30STMluvva 0
Haha 31 -WIN
fulbrama000 0
haha agreed
Siji 0
XD Lisp! Nice one! XD
SadinSherman 16
Why?
mamamiaaa_fml 12
oh wow are people now getting divorced before they get married these days? I hate when people say divorce to minor things in general. At least try to work to problems go to therapy etc before "we grew apart - divorce" or "he/she works too much - divorce" I know though certain things like he's having sex with other men/women or he abuses me should be divorce. but uhh who cares why am I talking I've never been close to marriage.
barneyfife 0
exactly! can it!
mamamiaaa_fml 12
never!
unclepester 0
I'd marry you, if i didn't get married already, but maybe she will abuse me, than it's splitsville!
th3disturbed 0
uhh I don't think they're married... so idk what this comment means.
badsportsmanshit 0
he is saying it like he has a lisp fucknuts eat shit shirlock
xdeathangel771 0
divorth
NeonBubblez 6
Actually, she meant to put a ring on it, Dumbass.
kiara16 0
Wow, u must be a douche. This is like the third comment I've disliked of yours...smh
natsaysheyyy 16
Obviously, they're not married yet. -_________-;
smiley1014 23
Wow you have a funny girlfriend! She also probably wasn't impressed with what you sent her!
alakomonus 0
win
torodeoro 0
she was impressed that same night after I put a ring on it. i did it that same day
claireful 4
ok "OP".... but hey! if it makes you feel special pretending that your FML actually made it on the site, whatever.
tundraman07 0
instant win!!!!!!
VaGino432 0
that sucks bro, she's going to toss your salad.
smiley1014 23
It could have been worse. She could have shown her friends and told them "Hey look, it's like a penis...only smaller!
CitrusGirl 0
Worse than that "hey look it's like your penis-only bigger!"
twilightfreak779 0
win for her!!