Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML
Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML
Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML
Today, while I was driving around the neighborhood, I passed my neighbors' house only to see their dog with a full-grown dead cat in its mouth. Only one family owns a cat in our neighborhood. FML
Today, despite me not liking cats, which my wife knew, she got a cat anyway. Her cat went for a walk outside and was hit by a car. I rushed outside to help the cat but found she was already dead, and the culprit had driven away. When my wife found out that her cat was dead, she thought I'd killed her. FML
Today, I met my neighbors for the first time, as they helped me carry my dead cat off the road. FML
Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML
Today, I saw a poor helpless cat in the middle of the road while driving. I pulled over and scooped it in my arms to bring it to safety. Not only did I get mauled and scratched by the cat, my car also wasn't put in park and rolled away hitting a parked car. FML
Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML
Today, my dog ran away. Luckily my neighbors caught him before he got too far. Now they won't give him back because they think I did something to him to make him want to run away. FML
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Top comments
robc32ca 4
you sick moron.
Senseless_487 29
Way to take responsibility for your actions. YDI!
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Comments (310)
iHOOT4Hooters 0
You should have told them that you were moving the cat out of the road so no more cars could hit it.
disturbed_girl29 0
my visual of you stooping over behind their car with a dead cat and your neighbors watching through the window with coffee and newspaper in their hands (my visuals are detailed) made me LOL.
cathyran25 0
wtf is wrong with u
iwannabeloved 2
are you ******* retarded?
BonJovi821 3
I'm disgusted to live in the same state as you, you piece of shit.
sadistmonkey 19
I have a feeling that the writer of the fml and the protagonist of the fml are not the same people. In other words, the person who witnessed the other guy trying to frame the neighbor is actually the one who wrote the fml. But that's just my guess.
bravobilly 0
its just a cat...who cares?
jswizzle_ 6
as if you'd touch a dead animal. YDI!
Ethos_fml 0
This will be moderated but YOU SICK **** HOW DARE YOU KILL A KITTY! I understand it was an accident but YOU DON'T ******* TRY TO PIN IT ON ITS OWNERS. I HOPE YOU GET HIT BY A CAR AND THEN THE DRIVER DUMPS YOUR BODY IN A RIVER. Thank you very much.
nonigz 0
booo