Today, while I was driving around the neighborhood, I passed my neighbors' house only to see their dog with a full-grown dead cat in its mouth. Only one family owns a cat in our neighborhood. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my neighbors for the first time, as they helped me carry my dead cat off the road. FML
Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML
Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML
Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML
Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
Today, my sister came over for a visit. I was going to surprise her with the news that I had spontaneously gotten a cat. The first thing she told me when she came in was that she ran over my neighbor's cat. None of my neighbors have cats. FML
Today, my neighbor let me know that they've been taking care of my cats while I was away, including letting them in and out of my house. I don't own a cat. FML
Today, despite me not liking cats, which my wife knew, she got a cat anyway. Her cat went for a walk outside and was hit by a car. I rushed outside to help the cat but found she was already dead, and the culprit had driven away. When my wife found out that her cat was dead, she thought I'd killed her. FML
Today, I walked outside to see my dog killing my cat. My spouse tried to cheer me up - "Hey, at least we don't have to buy cat food anymore!" FML
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Top comments
alex_jaguara 33
Better ask him to put down the damn dog. And the neighbour while he's at it.
RichardPencil 32
Once you've identified an assassin, you suddenly realize how often you'd need the service!
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
Is it your family? Ask the guy from the previous story -- he can hook you up with lots of dead cats.
alex_jaguara 33
Better ask him to put down the damn dog. And the neighbour while he's at it.
Axelle_fml 21
No the problem isn't the dog. The problem is the owner who is irresponsible and shouldn't have animals.
RichardPencil 32
Once you've identified an assassin, you suddenly realize how often you'd need the service!
bloopaloop 27
Not anymore
Brandin Howard 4
Could it be a stray?