Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
awesome
United States
Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML
DM
Fayville, United States
Today, I walked into what I thought would be a surprise birthday party. It wasn't. It was my parents staging an intervention over my cat obsession. FML
petlover
United States
Tactful
Today, I had to put my 17 year-old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML
Anonymous
Mulino, United States
Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML
Anonymous
Great start to the day
Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML
Sprtsgeek13
Camden, United States
Welcome to the family!
Today, I had my girlfriend over to meet my parents. After dinner, we were in the living room talking. My dad thought it would be funny to grab our cat, stick it down his shirt, then pretend to give birth to it, with sound effects. FML
jsmills92
Cranston, United States
Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML
whymomwhy
Salem, United States
Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML
Anonymous
Estonia
How could you?
Today, despite me not liking cats, which my wife knew, she got a cat anyway. Her cat went for a walk outside and was hit by a car. I rushed outside to help the cat but found she was already dead, and the culprit had driven away. When my wife found out that her cat was dead, she thought I'd killed her. FML
Username
United States
Today, my dog died. My parents told me to bury it out back. In the process, I managed to dig up my cat. FML
Top comments
jose1760 1
I'm calling PETA!!
flockz 20
"but the cat likes it in the oven..." too cruel?
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Comments (277)
hidinginthesky 0
Ouch
Eyeliner_fml 0
Pretend to be on the phone and "discuss" with the other person how to kill the person that ever kills your cat by making it look like an "accident" (:
weewee1 0
Are you having meatloaf tonight?
ripgeorgecarl1n 7
This sounds like a sketch from the Whitest Kids U Know.
ScaughtieHolden 11
You should be 100% sure they were talking about the cat. Wouldn't want to see op's name in the paper for "suicide" :o
Iamnotmyself 17
This is disgusting, your father and mother are sick idiotic morons with selfish intent. KaySL probably likes them.
MareNostrum 0
You've intruded on their plan. You know too much! Watch your back, OP, now you're expendable!
Give_Linux_A_Go 28
could be for the OP's own good, as cute as they are cats can be proper evil buggers >:(
prince122 0
FM9L for the cat, what if he walked in heard that. they could have sold it or something and made it look like it got lost.
EnEl_Infierno 15
*clears throat* sorry hairball.
NomNomNomNommm 4
OP needs to be careful. He's next.
ed11 1
Plot a plan to kill ur parents;)
tatsmcgrath 4
Ewww! What kind of sick person would want to do that! If they want to get rid of it they can send it to an animal shelter or something.
tatsmcgrath 4
Ewww! What kind of sick person would want to do that! If they want to get rid of it they can send it to an animal shelter or something.
BShady96 0
they were planning to kill it all 9 times? not a good idea...
tandem123 6
Give it to the shelter
theaws0m3guy 4
Is your cat peeing on your clothes in your closet even when you bought it a litter box?
witchdoctor1 9
^ 5 yea I tried that with my gf when she said she was goin to put my dog down. Calld up a bud and asked him where he hid "that 1 annoying vets body" long story short sleeping on the couch for a few days but still got the dog :P
glenzhao2 16
OP, get out of that place, cuz you're next, buddy.
2stroke 2
PETA=people eating tasty animals
jose1760 1
I'm calling PETA!!
CryMoreFMLs 15
They're going to pull the "it was under the car and I didn't see it" trick... Aren't they?
EvilPotato 15
2 not if I call first!
yougotapes 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Ahh poor kitty I would plot to kill my parents and make it look like an accident... See how they like hearing that lol
EvilPotato 15
42 you'd kill your own parents over a cat. wow what has the world come too?
livlafluv100 2
Op, it's easy.... Run away with the cat
jmar411 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Calm down PETA, it's just a cat... DOGS RULE!!!!!!!!
prince122 0
I would discuss how to kill my parents and make it look like an accident with the cat.
ryanriola 0
You know PETA stands for people eating tasty animals
CanWeMicrowaveIt 11
Parent- It was under the car and I didn't see it honey! I'm so sorry! OP- it's a inside cat though... She hates outdoors... Parent- DAMMIT! 2 HOURS OF PLANNING FOR NOTHING!!!!
annajane 0
88 PETA Stands for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals
kookookatchu 0
# 52, just plot not actually kill, retard
StoryOfTheYear 15
There's a reason calling someone an "animal" can be an insult, PETA is mostly a bunch of tree-buggers who don't know their left from their right
StoryOfTheYear 15
Lol typo :(
sxe_beast 11
#132 - since when? I've always thought it stood for People Eating Tasty Animals.
cblt2007 0
ehh tree buggers was good to though lol.
GoodLookingGeese 10
Let's call ALF 4 help!
jkmartinjk 16
What does Peter have to do with this?
Mertle1234 1
How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb? None... PETA can't change anything...
reptileguy1296 0
PETA is an organization whose goal is to ban the pet trade completely. This is blatantly proclaimed on their website if you know where to look. Also, the "donations" they get go directly to this cause in the form of lobbyists. The Humane Society of the US (HSUS) is the one that runs the sad commercials. Did you know that just one fifth of one percent of donations go to actual shelters(by the way nationwide they only support 12). They support PETA's goals. By the way, they've already banned several constrictor snakes in states like Florida. These snakes have yet to kill a person, and very very very few actually remotely have the potential. This is more than can be said for dogs. By the way I have a dog, who has snapped at me. My 3 constrictors never have.
Alwayspullout 7
240, I have no clue what you just said, and I don't really care.
AniluTheAwesome 0
Awh hell nah. I would be pissed :p
flockz 20
"but the cat likes it in the oven..." too cruel?
levibarks 5
Cat the other white meat
hidinginthesky 0
Yes. It is
flockz 20
im so sorry!!! let me listen to your feelings! need a tissue?
EvilPotato 15
35 yes flockz i do need I tissue.
StopDropNRoll 11
I don't think they were crying.. They're trying to eat it! D: At least that's what I get from white meat
eminemchick 19
flockz dont listen to evilpotato, he needs the tissue not for his eyes o_0
LaughinStock 16
There are worst things in hotdogs..so it's all good I think we can eat cat :)
EvilPotato 15
46 who told you what! er I mean noooo.
justSTOPx100 5
The cat would have to be jewish to make it look like it liked the oven...
CityCunt 0
3 Don't you mean the Jew?
GoodLookingGeese 10
Let's call ALF 4 help!
Allie1324 0
Ur a asshole go to hell
kingnate16 0
I bet they donate it to a Chinese restaurant and say they thought it would be kept as a pet.
SwaggerMelon 6
Malk reference?
Life_sucks_13 6
Lol my cat literally slept on top of the stove
evamusical 12
Curiosity. That'll do it!
iAmScrubs 19
If there is one thing I have learned in life, it I that the cat will always come back and kill you. Whether it hits you with a semi-truck it feeds you to the zebras, I do not know.
alicekittykatt 0
Thumbs up for zebras!
starsfan_9 7
Just don't bury the cat in the ancient Indian burial grounds....
MagicallyFat 12
If any body tries to harm my cat they will be found dead 7 hours later. Not 5, not 6 but 7
Lanceeden 12
If anyone killed my cat, I would just wait for the other 8 lives to kick in.
androiddestroya 7
or bury them in a pet cemetery O.O'
trishmg12 4
that's ridiculous.. if they dont want him just take him to an SPCA not kill it.
Dalliance 4
They don't want the rest of the family to know that they wish to get rid of the cat. Having it die "accidentally" allows them to maintain that charade, but taking it to the SPCA doesn't. At least, that's my take on their twisted logic.
brodway_dreamer 0
Why wouldn't they give it way and say it ran way.
Thompyxxxxx 0
what and let spca have all the fun of putting it down?
DeathMaple 3
Give it up for adoption.
daAce77 8
Man you have the cool parents! Jk lol
bankrupt 15
Yes, thank you No. 8. If they don't want the cat, then take it to the shelter where it has a chance at being adopted by someone who wants it. What sick freaks would even think of planning to kill their own pet and try to make it look like an accident? That is so disgusting. Really OP, there is something wrong with your parents.
Listerinekiss_fml 7
wow op I'm sorry I guess not everyone's a cat person
starsfan_9 7
And now OP knows too much, and is a "problem" which has to be dealt with
xgetxbentx 13
Please go put it up for adoption. The cat deserves a loving home, not to be killed :(
ThorneCrossed 9
Bring in a dog, obviously
jmar411 12
"Let's see here, do we want the pit bull, the part Doberman/part dachshund, or the bull mastiff?"
EvilPotato 15
how would that help any?
jasminea 0
aww. i'd be scared....
ShawnzieNstuff 6
Better than walking in on them having sex
jasminea 0
uhh... not at all. having your parents wanting to kill a living thing? or having them do something NORMAL?
unknown4444 0
If they want it out so bad, why not give it to someone or let it run away?