Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML
Today, I saw a woman being mugged. I ran up to help and pushed the guy off of her. She then punched me in the face and called the cops because she was, "just living out a fantasy" and I'm, "a lunatic for trying to help." FML
Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went to a bar during Irishfest. When I returned to my girlfriend she was crying and told me that this guy pushed her. I confronted the guy and poured my beer on him who just happened to be the chief of police. He was trying to make room for a guy in a wheelchair. FML
Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML
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Top comments
olpally 33
Well worth it. She should be ashamed for behaving that way off duty and hopefully you can clear your name.
lantz4levi 19
That would be embarrassing. Why did you arrest this lady? "She punched me after I was trying to force myself on her husband"
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Comments (65)
Drentiful 9
Can we have an update? Did you get in any legal trouble for this? I mean as far as I'm concerned you shouldn't because you were defending your husband after asking multiple times for her to stop I'm assuming. I would do the same for my girlfriend.
rose666anime 6
So what? Doesn't mean she's exempt from the law. She doesn't have diplomatic immunity.
Witchylady 18
Good on you. So what if she is a cop. Her actions were inappropriate and she deserved that punch.
JCush17 6
I guess she took to being "on the force" to a whole nother level. Haha SHAME
LH_FIRE_22 12
You're still in the right OP
olivia1196 2
Even knowing that I probably would've done the same.
dylan913 13
**** the ops
Shadowtrooper34 16
When they are off duty they are just like you. show her you mean business
Muerteds 18
Yes, yes, punch the offensive woman. Don't you dare let your husband act like a grown-up and handle his business. You're his wife, not his owner.
carrissa3 13
This needs a follow up