Night on the tiles
Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML
Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML
Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
Today, a couple of friends and I were driving around town and saw a lady who had accidentally backed her car up onto a concrete wall. Laughing, we all turned to look as we passed and I drove straight into a parked police car that had stopped to help her. FML
Today, I had to be bailed out of the local police station while hungover. I don’t remember any of it but I got so drunk yesterday I apparently went and took a shit on my cheating ex wife’s grave in front of witnesses, and was arrested while trying to stumble my way home. FML
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
Today, my wife got rear-ended and won't call the police, file an insurance claim, or send a photo of the wreck. She's too busy boozing it up in the city with her girlfriend. This is going to be an expensive lesson in adulting. FML
Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML
Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Charlie Given 28
Was the K-9 dog jealous of her marking his territory 😂😂🤣
SirEnigM0nk 22
Damn, she must have been pretty hammered to mistake a cop car for a fire hydrant.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (5)
Charlie Given 28
Was the K-9 dog jealous of her marking his territory 😂😂🤣
SirEnigM0nk 22
Pissed off even! Or on in this case...
SirEnigM0nk 22
Damn, she must have been pretty hammered to mistake a cop car for a fire hydrant.
Baka Loli 10
And you didn't stop her?
RichardPencil 32
You'd better hope she got a ticket for that. If she didn't, you don't want to know how she got out of that one.