Today, I left the sliding glass door to our townhouse open because it was such a beautiful day. Our new puppy, whom we have been potty training, peed in the yard and I praised him relentlessly. He then walked inside the house, pooped on the carpet, and ran back outside. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dog and I came in from an afternoon in the back yard and he immediately shat on the carpet. Way to go boy. FML
Today, I let my dog outside so he could pee. After an hour, I let him back in. He just wanted to come inside to pee on the floor. FML
Today, I snuck out of my bedroom to go pee very quickly, so I wouldn't wake up my new puppy who doesn't like being away from me. In the 60 seconds it took me to pee, wash my hands and walk back into the room she had pooped, peed, and left potty-paw-prints all over my bed. FML
Today, I gave my puppy a treat for finally doing his business in the grass instead of on the patio. He later puked it up all over the patio. FML
Today, I came downstairs to find that our dog's six puppies, who have their own puppy-door to go outside whenever they want, had peed and pooped all over the floor, walked through the pee, and were now happily chewing on a half-rotten deer's head which they had dragged inside. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML
Today, after explaining to my four-year-old why our new puppy was peeing on things to mark his territory, my son decided to follow suit and pee all over our house. FML
Today, we learned that our dog can run and urinate simultaneously. The entire house smells like piss. FML
Today, I heard noises outside my front door. I looked out through the window, only to see my boyfriend encouraging his dog to take a dump on my welcome mat. FML
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Top comments
saramarie 0
#3?
WhyAmUHere 19
What?
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Comments (102)
56578 0
Keep training, it happens to everyone with a new puppy. Praise him, but don't forget to punish him - think of it as teaching a toddler how to use the potty. And, I guess you found this out already, but carpets and puppies don't usually go well together....
IAmWhoIAM88 0
Lol how bad does that suck
doof_fisch 2
It's tough to potty-train puppies. This sounds harsh, but rubbing their noses in their mistakes really does help. Or I suppose you could go poop in his doghouse.
Koalafrau_fml 0
When I had kitten who used to do that... oh wait, you don't need to train cats. I'm not used to writing sarcastic comments but I am really fed up with seeing dog ***** absolutely everywhere in French streets. I know it's the owner's fault but cats won't poo anywhere and won't bite any child or elderly to death.
14nickel 0
lol #3 fail
mk1o3o 0
this calls for a drop kick
Hellcrapdamn 0
#3 Is right everybody.
itlybabe 0
THIS ISNT FUNNY. WHY IS IT ON HERE
catatonicsleep 17
It's only a baby, give it time to learn, at least it got it half right.
erinoty 0
That sucks i guess But not a FML at all