Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Charming
Today, I realised that my boyfriend calls me "bitch" more often than he calls me by my actual name. FML
Today, I finally addressed why my boyfriend started calling me "love bug" since we haven't used pet names in the entirety of our 2 year relationship. His response? "because I love you but you bug the shit out of me. It seemed appropriate." FML
Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML
Today, I learned that my parents' nickname for my fiancé is "dickwad." FML
Today, for the third time, my boyfriend called his dog by my name. FML
Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML
How nice of them.
Today, I learned what my office nickname means. My nickname? Butterface. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 5 years admitted why his pet name for me is "his beautiful swan". Apparently, the first few years we were dating, he and his friends secretly referred to me as "the ugly duckling" because my sister was so much hotter. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Bon appetit!
Today, I'm on a diet. I was compelled to start it when the only pet name my boyfriend could think of for me yesterday was, "My baby elephant." FML
Top comments
climbthoserocks 6
pita?
sourgirl101 29
I thought "pita" was a type of bread. Now it means pain in the ass? I will never be able to eat my gyros the same way.(:
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Comments (174)
phatdaddy62 23
it's your big black strap-on.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Perhaps there's a reason why he calls you that?
Spikergirl29 0
Also, your "cute" little pet name is "P.I.T.A" that also mean bitch in spanish, dump him, now
nerdsgetmehot 23
#82 Actually, "puta" means bitch.
Sinkhole 26
'Puta' is just a short and more vulgar way to say 'prostituta', that word obviously means 'prostitute'. 'Bitch' means 'perra'.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#114 Ah, gotcha. Still, #82 was way off! "Pita" is a type of yummy flatbread, and nowhere near being a vulgar term. :P
Sinkhole 26
Yeah, I definitely agree with you, she was way off! 'Pita' is nowhere as bad as 'puta', I like pita bread!
maidenandwhat 0
everyone knows a pita :)
urSMRT 0
isn't he sooo sweet!
Judus_beej 0
today my girlfriend wouldn't give me a ******** till I gave her a stupid nickname. fml.
RosiePatosie 0
He called you "Pita" ?
fbmb 0
I think nobody here knows what an acronym is... it's when you scramble the letters and get another word or phrase...
marylovesyou8D 7
Scramble the letters? Um, no. Wrong.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
No, that would be an anagram.
Cinn_fml 23
Apparently not. If they did then we'd have nowhere near as many spelling arguments.
teddyyluvsyhu 0
haha my cat name is pita bc its a pain in the a$$ lol
dotty23 0
That's freaking hilarious.