why
United States
Today, I learned that my parents' nickname for my fiancé is "dickwad." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Anonymous
Australia
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Pita
United States
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
somefamily
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Wayne, United States
Steve? Pete?
Today, I found out that I've been calling my boyfriend's dad by the wrong name for the past two years. No one had told me sooner because they liked laughing at me for it when I wasn't around. FML
Anonymous
Aberdeen, United Kingdom
Today, I overheard my dickhead dad telling my girlfriend that she's too good for me, then asking if she really wants to settle for someone like me. FML
oreoblizzard619
United States
Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML
kiki
United States
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
lawoman27
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
Anonymous
Newport, United States
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Anonymous
Saint Gallen, Switzerland
Today, I happily told my parents that my boyfriend proposed to me last night. My dad's response? "Marry that goofy bastard and you're out of the will." FML
Top comments
Doortje 30
Wow, they must really like him!
tic_tac_toe 0
is he a dickwad?
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Comments (176)
tic_tac_toe 0
is he a dickwad?
JojoChuo 8
His/her parents definitely think so x)
JojoChuo 8
His** I don't even know why I put her, unless he's a lady boy :p
impregnator 0
her parents
khaya 9
Who cares, he's a dickwad.
soccer7777 0
haha obviously her parents do.
cloudy01 0
funny stuff
bfsd42 20
exactly what I was gonna ask.
oblio 0
he's definitely a dickwad. get a prenuptial, op, you're gonna need it.
rscanlan313 0
he actually could be usually there has to be a reason why parents don't like there kids fiancé
hiyourcute 0
Is his name Richard Wadkins?;)
rebekahah 7
^ win. ^_^
number1beaner 0
Hey who cares he is still taping their daughter.
AceArctic 4
What is he taping?!?! ;)
atthegates 0
I believe he meant "tapping". derrrrrr
fml_psl 0
Abs.
dav3800 7
cool parents.
AceArctic 4
147 - Come on, you knew it was a joke.
skinollie 0
sooo is he?
heydere 0
I was gunna ask that too!!
FuckingRednecks 3
:(
mfelax9556 8
lol dickwad... :P whats wrog with him?
ivanoff 0
better than ass plunger!
urdirtyolduncle 15
better than **** juggling thundercunt..
Aerious 0
My mom used to call my ex "cockshit."
jrsgreenfire257 0
Well 68, does he have a shity ****?
Aerious 0
It was awkward and ugly but it didn't have shit on it.
hot00frb 4
wow that's a big **** right there lol
JetLifeNextLife 0
88- you're ******* 14 wtf
iRhymeWithHeaven 0
LIES!
Aerious 0
Actually he sent me nudes, I didn't ask for anything.
T3P33_fml 0
#96: yeaah no that was me sorry... wanna candy?
Zya_fml 8
Aerious - Okay, let me get this straight... Your ex sent you nudes when you didn't ask him to...and you showed the pictures to your mom so she can give you her opinion about his penis? Either you're ****** up or you're lying.
FuttBuck 0
101 - Probably fat and deformed?
seanders 10
There was a guy in my high school, he was 18 and ****** a12 year old. So I made the nickname "Diaper Sniper" for him and it caught on.
SparkyRoosta 2
That's what ya get for getting engaged to a dickwad...
CrAzyFlOriDaGiRl 1
lmfaoo I juss diedd xD
Doortje 30
Wow, they must really like him!
SirEBC 7
No, Doortje, I think that means that they DON'T like him. Pft, foreigners.
noobgang7 5
^
Naomiiiii 0
Ahhh, EBC you do realize he was being blatantly sarcastic right?
noobgang7 5
Sarcasm isn't hard to spot
SirEBC 7
Irony.
PSQ91 6
13 fails
Naomiiiii 0
;)
Doortje 30
Hey, I'm not a he, I'm a girl! :O
SirEBC 7
LOLOL Doortje is a boy, Doortje is a boy!! Now time to figure out Kay's gender...
illmatic2 16
I'm pretty sure Kay is a dude.... I think.
Doortje 30
So yeah, I borrowed Kay's detachable penis once, ONCE goddammit. That does not make me a boy! :(
yuggi1 11
Kay is a tranny. lol
Zmeilerr 22
No, Kay, is an unknown, undiscovered species. A very, very ****** up species indeed.
ILoveEggnog 7
Mmmmm....KaySL.
sarapsosis 1
Kay is actually Greg from the Wiggles
awardZu 0
I thought Kay was the pink telatubby...
Thanatos1206 0
Kay is all of us, we just don't know it yet.
UnknwnClassicGrl 5
Kay is Perez Hilton. End.
xxbreakgirlxx 0
yoour stupid
xxbreakgirlxx 0
yoour stupid
TheNewGuy03 29
kay is zaphod beeblebrox. i confirmed it myself. |the kid|
LadyClarik 8
Nah, Kay is The Stig...
natas_fml 13
No no no. Xenomorph.
LunaNstars 0
sucks to your fiance!
kittycatman2 3
Dear OP do your parents know something about dickwad they aren't telling you? How do they know anything about his dick? Maybe he did them before he took you for a ride? Inquiring minds want to know. #Funnythat.
nerdsgetmehot 23
That's better than "Tiny Dick."
labanana_fml 5
^ made my day
Cinn_fml 23
Might want to find out why they call him that if you want them to get along with him, or if they know something you don't. However, it isn't essential that your parents like your partner, it just helps in the long run.
Nagger_Batch 0
Shut the **** up.
yuggi1 11
Nagger_Batch, your comments are noway as sensible as hers. You, sir, should be the one to SHUT THE **** UP and GET AWAY FROM THE KEYBOARD.
Rawket_Lawnchair 0
Hey, yuggi, why you mad bro? lol.
yuggi1 11
Because they are always picking on Cinn. :/
Rawket_Lawnchair 0
Get over it, it's the Internet. His comment was funny as hell.
Nagger_Batch 0
^
cptmorgan15 2
I agree, Cinn is a buzzkill.
khaya 9
Someone always has to lay down the foundation, sadly this time it was cinn.
illmatic2 16
His comment wasn't funny at all.... Just a typical, unoriginal troll. At least Cinn can say that she is original.
Rawket_Lawnchair 0
With no sense of humour, such as yourself.
Cinn_fml 23
Ah, the trolls, how I have missed them. Wait, Yuggi, they still pick on me? Those mods must act quickly then, 'cause I haven't seen anything in ages. Nagger_Batch, Rawket & Cptmorgan - You're not cool, or funny. Yes, I am willing to judge both of those, but based on this experience I don't believe you have hopes of being so, but feel free to try again, I've been known to be wrong before.
lmaoatall 6
I don't see a problem with cinn's comment, she was just being insightful. yes, getting along with the parents is helpful... god I said it , let the war begin
Bagger_Natch 0
Shut the **** up ******.
ASHLEYbcddd 0
lol 69. That was random
Thanatos1206 0
Get ready to get moderated, 69!
illmatic2 16
And hopefully banned.
demonxshadow 1
she's white bro. epic fail,and I don't really see the ignorance in that most.
sarapsosis 1
69- wtf?!?! where did that come from you frickn psycho??? that is such an ugly word fucktard
explodingmuffint 0
how? look up the definition :/
explodingmuffint 0
how? look up the definition :/
Cinn_fml 23
Hey, Bagger_Natch, are you the same as Nagger_Batch? Either way, you fail, and if you are, it's in multiple ways.
jess6blondie9 3
Fail. ^
Naggerass 1
I'm inclined to agree with 69. Shut the **** up.
lmaoatall 6
geeez bagger, what the **** is your prob? your on a roll to be the most hated on this site. talk about some anger issues. damn
Rawket_Lawnchair 0
Lol, 69
Cinn_fml 23
#104, why do I sense a familiarity to your name?
lmaoatall 6
cinn- your dealing with the bagger- naggerass family. they're sitting around togethor writeing this crap and getting their kicks, probably smokeing and laughing it up. don't feed into their shit anymore their morons
Rawket_Lawnchair 0
He might be the same person :O
Cinn_fml 23
Lmaotall - Oh, but feeding trolls to either destroy them myself or allow someone else the honour is fun! Besides, I know that they need all the chances they can get because most aren't very good at what they do. Rawket_Lawnchair - Just because the mods got the earlier conv doesn't mean I forgot you. Also, you're not #104. :P (Which is the topic you were referring too). Edit: Darn, you edited your post! Ignore the relevent bits of my comment.
Rawket_Lawnchair 0
I read the number incorrectly lol. Then, epiphany struck :D
lmaoatall 6
ok cinn, I understand. you feed on this, and that's cool, promise me this then, stomp a ten foot mud hole in their asses..
Cinn_fml 23
I'll try.
hatesboners 0
hey dude, leave the hot brittish girl alone.
Bagger_Natch 0
129 158 samefag
rachii 0
It could always be worse, they could have disowned you. Or maybe they're trying to get you to disown them, because they don't wanna be the bad guys. Or maybe they just don't like either of you. I don't know *shrug*
lmaoatall 6
well atleast they sophisticated it up alittle, could have been ********, dickweed, dickdrip, something like that. be proud he's a dickward