Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I caught my best friend's wife being a cheating whore, and I told her either she told him the truth or I would. More fool me, she used the time I gave her to convince him I tried to sleep with her, so now he won’t believe a word I say, and he punched me in the jaw. FML
Today, I witnessed my girlfriend and best "friend" getting intimate. In a dim-witted attempt to cover up, my best friend proclaimed, "This isn't what it looks like!" I might have given him the benefit of the doubt, had he not still been inside my girlfriend at the time. FML
Today, I found out that my husband of 12 years has been sleeping with my best friend of even longer for who knows how long. She actually tried to turn it around on me and implied that it was my fault for finding out about it. FML
Today my best friend called me at 6 a.m., ranting and accusing me of sleeping with her husband. I live two hours away and haven't seen him in person in over six months. FML
Today, I saw my buddy at the mechanic's on speaker with his wife. I did a very fake female voice and said, “He’s here with me! He’s my man now!” He rushed home to see all his stuff on fire on the front lawn. I had no idea how psycho she was and now he wants to kill me. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend. He actually had the balls to say her leg was asleep and he was trying to wake it up. FML
Today, I told my friend about a fight I had earlier with my girlfriend. He thought it'd be funny to use my phone while I was in the bathroom and text her "ure such a cunt". She wouldn't believe the truth, even when my friend confessed to her. She thought I paid him to take the fall. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML
Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML
Today, I tried a trick my friend taught me; I initiated sex as my husband was getting ready for work, then guilted him when he refused. After he left, I texted my friend that her trick worked wonderfully. Too bad I sent it to my husband instead. FML
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Top comments
beastmode707 1
Should have been a real gun
DocBastard 40
And then you set his ass on fire, right? Right? Very little pisses me off more than infidelity.
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Comments (216)
Jakemachen54 0
Sucks to suck
palmer420 2
Yeah you would know about sucking so get the dick out of your mouth and stop talking like a douche.
meggieeee51 9
Poor guy, just lost his friend and wife. Screw cheaters
thelastavailable 13
But screwing cheaters is exactly what got them all in this mess. Sorry, had to xD
meggieeee51 9
Haha that was pretty good :-p
Cloudmaker 3
Burn his ass
Trisha_aus 15
Burn his ass. Shoot her. Hate lying cheating bitches and bestfriends
MrGroovy28 7
I think you are now on the updated terrorist watch-- i mean look at you and your posts, would you expect anything less?
KeyboardMe 2
82- you're an idiot.
linkinpark69 7
Maybe he was just agreeing to it because you were holding what he thought was a real gun in his face
Senseless_487 29
So, if you thought you had a real gun to your face, and were accused of sleeping with someone's wife when you really didn't, you would confess anyway, giving him reason to pull what you thought was a real trigger? Yeah, I didn't think so.
uncivil 5
Stop listening to linkin park... They are making you dumb
linkinpark98 24
66 - Really? I love Linkin Park! Hence, my username. And I am top of my classes. ^_^ Don't be so ignorant.
loserman67 36
That really stinks. It leaves you with nothing. Set his balls on fire and them stomp on them to put it out, then divorce her cheating ass and keep everything. Sorry Brother, hope you recover.
lhfireman 0
OP while holding lighter: "You screwed my wife!" Friend: "Actually....yeah" OP: "WHAT!!??" Friend: "Yeah. While you were out looking for that stupid lighter. By the way, comfortable bed" OP: *flicks lighter and ignites "friend" starting at his balls
CryMoreFMLs 15
Tried too hard man.
icrest80 4
G
katiebeee 0
Well, ask no questions, tell no lies. But for real that really stinks fyl :(
palmer420 2
Or how about girls should stop spreading their legs to every guy that gives them attention just a thought you slam pig
CallMeMcFeelii 14
You should of started to burn him. Shit like that is unforgivable.