Today, I had to bite the bullet and finally buy maternity pants. Problem is, I'm not pregnant and I'm a 25-year-old man. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to give in and order men's jeans, just so I could have functional pockets. Ordinarily not a problem, except I have wide hips and a suitable size doesn't seem to exist. FML
Today, while shopping for clothes, I asked the assistant to recommend something for me. She took me to the maternity section. Thanks, but I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I tend to get bloated in the afternoons when I suffer from stress. Lately, I've been so stressed out that I'm seriously considering buying maternity pants, because not even my stretchiest sweat pants will fit me after 4 p.m. FML
Today, I now know why my new jeans are so comfy. They're maternity jeans. I thought the soft elastic in front was just for added comfort. Apparently, I need to lose some weight. FML
Today, I'm 35 years-old and I had to buy myself a hat from the kids section. FML
Today, I had to buy another pair of "fat jeans", because my old "fat jeans" became my new "skinny jeans." FML
Today, I'm 25-years-old and I need to wear an adult diaper as I have lost my bladder control. FML
Today, I wet my pants at the grocery store. I didn't feel like I had to go until I was inside. The embarrassing thing (besides me being 37)? I actually made it to the store's public bathroom and made it to the toilet, but my belt was on so tightly that I had to undo it and it doesn't work like an ordinary belt. FML
Today, I asked my mom to buy me new shorts. She bought fluffy bubble shorts. I'm a 20 year-old guy. FML
Today, I have to go on a diet, because I can't afford to buy bigger clothes. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
foxwasalamb 24
thinking you should lose some weight...
JMichael 26
Go the gym if you're not satisfied with your weight
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (95)
facestealer234 2
y would u want to do something like tht ur ******* stupid
myra786 9
well they are comfortable, but hopefully this motivates you to work out :)
lina21 12
So you could just buy bigger sizes in men's pants....or lose weight
sehrgutmann 19
YDI
baddayeveryday1 7
Bit the burger*, just kidding and by the way it seems I'd recommend you go to the gym or do more exercise
chosha_fml 27
Interesting. I wonder if there would be almost 2 times the FYL to YDI is OP was a woman.
AmusedButton 7
kill the fatty
miyaviichan 27
Just my advice, from someone who had never (ever, I'm serious) lost weight before in their life. Walk uphill. Walk until you want to die. Walk until you think you might collapse (you won't, your body tries to make you stop waaaaayy before that point.) Keep bottled water on you and pour it on yourself in case you feel too hot. Best places for it are on your face, arms, and neck. If you start seeing black spots you know you're doing it right. But take a break at that point lol. People are afraid of pushing their bodies, but once you struggle through immense pain, you get stronger for it. This all might seem a bit harsh but man, you drop weight FAST. Also drink lots of water! (Sorry about this stupid-long comment.)
mrhe3t 9
Not stupid-long at all... Bruce Lee said some shit along those lines. Simply put, weight affects health, if health isn't of any concern, then don't worry about your weight, if it is, then you should.
Tawnkat 13
Disgusting.
McMelons 9
Going for a jog is cheaper than maternity pants bro