Today, I had to bite the bullet and finally buy maternity pants. Problem is, I'm not pregnant and I'm a 25-year-old man. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to give in and order men's jeans, just so I could have functional pockets. Ordinarily not a problem, except I have wide hips and a suitable size doesn't seem to exist. FML
Today, while shopping for clothes, I asked the assistant to recommend something for me. She took me to the maternity section. Thanks, but I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I tend to get bloated in the afternoons when I suffer from stress. Lately, I've been so stressed out that I'm seriously considering buying maternity pants, because not even my stretchiest sweat pants will fit me after 4 p.m. FML
Today, I now know why my new jeans are so comfy. They're maternity jeans. I thought the soft elastic in front was just for added comfort. Apparently, I need to lose some weight. FML
Today, I'm 35 years-old and I had to buy myself a hat from the kids section. FML
Today, I had to buy another pair of "fat jeans", because my old "fat jeans" became my new "skinny jeans." FML
Today, I'm 25-years-old and I need to wear an adult diaper as I have lost my bladder control. FML
Today, I wet my pants at the grocery store. I didn't feel like I had to go until I was inside. The embarrassing thing (besides me being 37)? I actually made it to the store's public bathroom and made it to the toilet, but my belt was on so tightly that I had to undo it and it doesn't work like an ordinary belt. FML
Today, I asked my mom to buy me new shorts. She bought fluffy bubble shorts. I'm a 20 year-old guy. FML
Today, I have to go on a diet, because I can't afford to buy bigger clothes. FML
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Top comments
foxwasalamb 24
thinking you should lose some weight...
JMichael 26
Go the gym if you're not satisfied with your weight
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Comments (95)
K0B3 5
You deserve it cause you can work out
unyquefails 2
This...is a problem
Sarcasam137 5
AS LONG AS YOUR HAPPY DONT GIVE.
Rectov 10
Wait can't you just buy bigger pants?