Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML
Today, I was having an intense erotic dream. It was going great until I thought, "I hope this isn't a dream." This caused me to wake up. This isn't the first time I've cockblocked myself in a dream. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML
Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
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Top comments
Midrash 5
Your nuts...
SkoomaKi 28
Expect that when your getting real head. Never rush a woman. I wish I could have sex dreams, if only I had imagination...
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Comments (98)
demcatsbro 3
"LOL U DESERVE IT FOR TRYING TO CHOKE AN IMAGINARY GIRL" You all are dumbasses, you know that? The girl is not real, it was his imagination. This is why your boyfriends cheat, if you can even get one. Crazy bitches.
COolErKiD1414 0
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahahaha that's some funny shit right there
angelofsaturn 23
yeah when you ram a penis down a girl's throat she'll probably vomit on you if not bite you for being an ass. just think about it: do you wanna be smothered by pussy?
hillbillyboy1993 7
actually yes i do :)
TheHezzer 17
yeah, i would quite like to be too!
dr3amcatchr 2
Surprise!
diamondbaby16 4
The hell .?
justusgilbertson 3
hahahahahhHhh
MINETURTLExD 0
So you didn't really get head, but you really did get punched in the balls? Hmm...
Kyouzou 15
I don't really understand why it matters what he was doing to an imaginary woman in a dream, however, regardless of what he was doing to this FIGMENT OF HIS IMAGINATION, you have to admit it sucks to get hit in the balls, even more so if you're in the middle of what I would assume was a very nice dream.
chica19 0
Thats exactly why guys SHOULD NOT do that ;D
animal50199 10
OP I think it would be best for you and your future kids if you try your best to not have wet dreams that involve you hitting or pushing near your groin area.