Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML
Poor pillow
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML
All I need to do…
Today, I was having an intense erotic dream. It was going great until I thought, "I hope this isn't a dream." This caused me to wake up. This isn't the first time I've cockblocked myself in a dream. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML
Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Top comments
Midrash 5
Your nuts...
SkoomaKi 28
Expect that when your getting real head. Never rush a woman. I wish I could have sex dreams, if only I had imagination...
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Comments (98)
gracehi 33
I don't understand all the YDIs on this one. He can't help what he does while he's sleeping. And for those of you claiming that he shouldn't have pushed on "dream" girl's head, we ALL do things in dreams we wouldn't do in real life. I recently had a dream that I brutally murdered my ex husband. That doesn't mean it's something I actually plan to do.
griffy14 9
I agree. All ydi people are idiots. Not to mention how do they know what this dream girl wanted? It's a dream girl, the other posters need to stop acting like it was real.
Discombobulated9 12
I personally find it amusing how everyone is saying "You'll be lucky if you get her again, you asshole!". Yeah, a dream girl is literally waiting on the edge of her seat for him to fall asleep again so she can give him a good telling off. People's logic amazes me sometimes.
sunshine_cc 3
Ewww! The head push is awful.
kayliers 5
Hahaha!
ryad69 0
Idk why he deserved it! He was havin a good dream till his hands betrayed him
Egoodie1889 3
lol
Emberlynnn 9
Serves you right.... I hate it when a guy pushes on my head
Brilliant66star 17
Have yourself examined for sleep disorders, because the body is meant to be in a state of paralysis during 'dream' sleep, so things like this can be avoided. FYL.
MoxieThoughts 0
ahahahahahaha, I'm sorry but that was great
AParanoidStudent 1
At least you didn't punch the beautiful woman :p
damnu 3
OP, sorry for you :-/ People : Before judging, You don't how he was pushing the head, you weren't in his dream, so please don't be so prude, and get a sex-life, that could be helpful. I like to gently push the head of my gf while she's down. And she does exactly the same. It's just being excited and a normal reaction to pleasure. So, everything depends on how he was pushing the head. Moreover, it's just a dream, nothing important, last night I dreamt that I was ******** cows. Do you think I like scato-things with animals ? How many dr. Freud are here ?