Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. Being the stud that I am, after a short time I turned to her and said "You think you're ready for a round two?" She replied "No, but I do think I'm ready for the rest of round one." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response, "Lucky you." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all. When I had finished, sweating and tired, I looked down at her and smiled, obviously pleased with myself. She looked up at me and said, "Wait, was that it?" FML
Today, I had sex with my wife. After we finished and were cuddling, she said, "This is the part I like." FML
Today, while sleeping over at my girlfriend's house for the first time, I got up to go to the bathroom. I went to go back and once in the room asked, "You ready for round two baby?" The light came on and at this moment I realized I went into her parents' bedroom by mistake. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
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Top comments
jackaaa 0
Hahaha. Clearly you are not a stud.
shadydogman 0
S-ex T-urned U-pside D-own
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Comments (157)
jj505_fml 0
OWNED
playful2088 0
hahahahah "i'm ready for the rest of round one"...i'm so gonna use that line someday!!! hahha.
Rushkie 2
#21-- homeboy doesn't have to be psychic to know he can't last 2 minutes. There's a difference between not knowing what she likes and just being a lazy d-bag. I'm a guy and these dudes with this "but it takes two! My girl's a dead fish Waahh" bitching are cracking me up. Thanks for admitting you turn chicks to ice in bed, teach em or leave em and what does that even have to do with this post? If you haven't figured it out girls count the time from start to finish, not just the bumping uglies part. ALL you have to do is go down on her to start things off, and when you get close go down some more. Get creative. What girl would ever complain about that? Why is it like, "oh no I've put it in ahh! can't stop now!!" Seriously man up and be thankful that you're pretty much guaranteed to get yours, focus on her, and she might actually spread it around that she's getting it right. oh no!
bonafidehustler 0
That's just not very funny.
FML_baby 0
Aww how sad, poor guy. I mean... Some guys just have NO stamina. :/
superkid 0
you cant spell stud without STD... You my friend, epic fail! Pwned bith! =)
superkid 0
epic fail my friend. you cant spell stud without std. But dud on the other hand begins with d For DOUCHE! :) ...youve been a mavellous audience
justdance45 0
86 said it all
llSgtScopell 0
Always make sure you get your girl off before you even start. That way if your having an off day or haven't done it in a while she still gets her kicks.
StopBeingADouche 0
I think we're all ready for a nice round of learning how to interpret sarcasm.