Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. When my soon-to-be-husband was saying his vows, he didn't say my name. He said his mother's. FML
Today, it's mine and wife's one-year anniversary. After only being married for a year, I quickly understood what her father really meant when he said, "Your problem now" and chuckled at our wedding. FML
Today, I got married. My mother told me to stop being difficult, because she was the mother of the bride, and it was her day to shine. FML
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
Today, I got married. After the ceremony, my sister asked to talk to me. I followed her and she told me that we are no longer related because we don't have the same last name anymore. FML
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Top comments
womblebat 2
your dad is a legend. you need a sense of humour op.
rhcpalex93 0
well, he's right!
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Comments (161)
princess_88 0
I see someone can't take a joke!
kreally 0
Your dad sounds hilarious!
elveer 0
hahahahahhaa
at0micmin3r 23
Someone has no sense of humor!! I'm sure everyone laughed heartily. Seriously, get a sense of humor. You probably ruined your groom's wedding. Poor guy. Poor father. D:
mitylilmonkey 0
That's hilarious!!
franwins0827 7
I hope he meant it as a joke, but maybe it was in poor taste for your wedding.
BLueline89 0
It doesnt sound that bad. sounds more cute and funny to me....depending on how he said it. at my wedding when it was time for the rings my best man tried to give me his flask instead lol.
Jenmic 16
My dad would so say this but he would claim he's joking.
Skypinklove 0
He could have just been joking. Have a sense of humor. When my sister got married, she drove around the block w/ her husband and came back. My dad announced in front of all the guests that there were "no returns". Unless he was completely serious, this isn't an FML.
Epikouros 32
When my sister got married, my grandfather said "Now you can't get back!" after signing the wedding register as a witness. Everybody laughed. More silly jokes followed at the reception. 26 years later, they divorced because her husband was drinking - because he had trouble accepting he was gay. So this joke probably means your marriage is DOOMED.