Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at our wedding reception my new father-in-law gave his speech, saying his little girl was too good for me. Everyone, including my parents, agreed. FML
Today, I got married. My father saw this as a good time to give some solemn, heartfelt advice to my new husband: "That ring gets real heavy fast." I was standing right there. So was my mother. FML
Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. When my soon-to-be-husband was saying his vows, he didn't say my name. He said his mother's. FML
Today, it's mine and wife's one-year anniversary. After only being married for a year, I quickly understood what her father really meant when he said, "Your problem now" and chuckled at our wedding. FML
Today, I got married. My mother told me to stop being difficult, because she was the mother of the bride, and it was her day to shine. FML
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
Today, I got married. After the ceremony, my sister asked to talk to me. I followed her and she told me that we are no longer related because we don't have the same last name anymore. FML
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Top comments
womblebat 2
your dad is a legend. you need a sense of humour op.
rhcpalex93 0
well, he's right!
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Comments (161)
rhcpalex93 0
well, he's right!
luvzit 0
and thank god for that!!! he was thinking aswell
j4ym4n 2
Mmm boobs.
luvzit 0
:)
earljonez 22
haha classic
EffinAhole 0
is it just me or is one bigger than the other?
abstar 0
it has been noted a few times on this site that those ******* are uneven. methinks she needs a more supportive bra.
awesomeguy1221 4
Methinks? I'm not sure that's a word. lol
luvzit 0
it's the lighting in the photo!! read my profile :)
luvzit 0
it's been noted?? lol loser and it's not a bra and you should know that!! maybe ur gay :)
luvzit 0
thanking you :)
KillTheDance 4
I was JUST thinking that!!!
ifyouseekamy666 0
I still don't think they're even..
DjeePee 25
This reminds me of those scared teenagers who thought that they weren't normal because one boob was bigger then the other. Grow up people, it is completely normal.
luvzit 0
52 you wouldn't know what even was if it hit u in the face... ur profile pic looks like u want to be a man??
SupermanXL 3
here's a crazy idea. if you don't want people to start in on "even or not", don't use a picture of a lopsided top as your pic. i don't care if it's natural or not, you know you're gonna rile someone up with that picture.
omfgrofl1337 0
These are even <-------
ifyouseekamy666 0
wut r u talking about? my moustache has nothing to do with ur uneven boobs
luvzit 0
I don't care anyways mwhaha!!! so everyone should get over it
ifyouseekamy666 0
it's freakin annoying as hell, ur that desperate for attention u made ur pic a picture of ur unever boobs? that's actually really pathetic I hope u realize that
ifyouseekamy666 0
uneven*
luvzit 0
I'm glad I annoy you :)
BDTM 0
agree with 64, and I bet luvzit is a preteen boy.
miraggg 1
methinks is a word invented by shakespeare or however you spell his name
ifyouseekamy666 0
67- I kno right? either that or she just has an ugly as hell face
IVANTTOCOME 0
Don't hate, congratulate, nice racks ladies.
MRiKiCCS 0
61^ ftw! 8-)
Renesaga 8
Ahem. I think 65 is cute, even with that mustache thing. And 66 slightly grosses me out. I'm not instigating an argument, or flirting. I'm just throwin' my opinion out there.
LILWAYNE40 3
haha she has an uneven boob!
SunshineBoy21 0
LOL. It almost looks like the were photoshopped from 2 different pics ;) ps. I think your 'stash is cute. lol
fulbrama000 0
luvzit stop whoreing around on fml you bring prostitution to a new level
Serr 0
lol.
ktrose 0
Putting this out there, The tops not on proper on one side of her.
zkchild 0
By the time I got to the bottom of this comment column I forgot what this FML was about. It had something to do with a preteen boy having uneven boobs right?
rhcpalex93 0
wow, just wow. I never want the first comment ever again.....
madgolden 0
Haha I Bet . :D
zkchild 0
Those comments are gone. Ok well my friends dad did the same thing, not a big deal.
mz_booty 0
yep them chicks got deleted haha
zkchild 0
How did that happen?
Linebacker74 8
My grandpa (my mom's side) said the same thing to my dad at their wedding
chewbeccaz 0
FIRST!
rhcpalex93 0
fail
DeesFMLs 0
if its your wedding day why are you on this site?? do you not have a life?
sduhamel 0
are u dumb or dumb? in FML submission the standard format starts with Today n ends with FML. she doesnt have a choice
Dejaay 2
Umm, i might be wrong... but i think she's dumb ;o
hamza234 0
tell him girl
madgolden 0
Geez ; It Takes Like 5 Seconds To Post One Of These Things . Of Course The Bride Has A Life !
beccusmaximus 0
It takes a lot longer to capitalize every word of a sentence. Can someone please explain this phenomenon to me?
mbouf 0
some phones do that automatically. my old cell used to do that it was so annoying.
crazycoltfan 2
Was thinking the same thing... Fail post
PugDelatorre 11
Are......are you mentally retarded?
3kitten3 10
Awe that is horrible! I'm sorry!
Technocidal 0
Anyone actually realize he was probably joking? Stop being so literal. Most FML's on this site are people who don't get that it's a joke
frolick123 0
99 is so right... lots of times its only an fml becuz sarcasm cant be conveyed through writing
kboonie 0
don't lie
womblebat 2
your dad is a legend. you need a sense of humour op.
evillittleme 5
agreed
sirdolittle 0
Well, he could have chosen a better moment to joke around. It's suppose to be one of the greatest days of her life, so try to please her and not ruin this day. (I realize he could have done way worse than than, but still !)
tikimuppet 11
@16 it's not really ruining her day. She should lighten up and bit and learn to take a joke
btnhdude 0
if you can take a ******' dick you can take a ******' joke! - Immortal Technique
DjeePee 25
I don't know about you guys, but on a day that is supposed to be the most fantastic one in mine and my partners life I wouldn't be pleased if my dad called me a problem in front of everybody who knows me. Every joke has its time, and OP's dad should have timed it a little bit better. I would feel a little humiliated and ashamed. It also depends on the way the dad said it, serious funny. But I still wouldn't like it.
Marzee 14
#34. amen. immortal always has the answer.
Iamnotyourmom 0
Dude #16 & #37. He was JOKING. Its funny. The same boring speeches would be well... same and boring. You have stick up yours.
Babygurl151 0
Agreed! ^
DjeePee 25
Well, if you love jokes like that, jeeeej for you! Have a fun wedding! But just don't forget that there are people outside who want to keep the formal part of a wedding serious, and that they are in their right. Their wedding, their rules. OP doesn't need to 'lighten up', it's her special day, if she doesn't want to be joked about, she's in her right.
mitylilmonkey 0
Ya but if MY dad would have said that everyone would have laughed. Including me. I'm sure it wasn't meant to be mean he was probably nervous an just cracked a joke lol
thisgirl2u 9
Your father speaks the truth and he does it with humor. :)
PSQ91 6
And your night with the groom is so boring you are coming on FML?
sarah48_fml 0
you are an idiot..
brootalxkeni 0
lmfao! you must be a problem xD
luvzit 0
lol he Is the problem
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
I'm sure he was just bringing in a little comic relief to having to deal with the loss of his daughter...