Artic
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
anne
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
wtf
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Backhanded
Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Chubby Love, by Bon Iver
Today, I realised that my husband and I have gotten so fat that his already small dick no longer even reaches me. FML
FML
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was having sex with a girl. After we finish, she tells me she already has a boyfriend, and that his penis is larger than mine. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Multitasking
Today, my wife picked up her phone, answered a text, added a few things to her phone's shopping list, and looked at her phone calendar to remind me I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. She did all this whilst my penis was inside her, giving it my best effort as well. Self confidence zero. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Humblebrag
Today, I learned that my insecurities regarding my dick size were unfounded, as my girlfriend gushed over my dick and said it was amazing. We then got down to business, and almost immediately heard, "Ow! Fuck, that's my cervix! This hurts! Stop!" FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML
littleguy
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, an extremely attractive woman from FedEx came to deliver my new phone. I was wearing athletic shorts and had an erection. She looked down and laughed. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Let down
Today, I went on a date with a sweet guy who was 6”11 tall, a size 14 shoe, a 55 inch chest from all his gym muscles, hands like baseball gloves, and gorgeous green eyes… all attached to a 3 inch penis that I could barely feel, and that lasted barely 15 seconds. The foreplay was shit too. FML
Anonymous
Burwood, Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend having phone sex less than 10 feet away from me. FML
Top comments
Alliria 3
Am I the only person that feels worse for the guy then the OP?
bgo7 0
if its true love than it shouldnt matter if his erection ia 3.5 or 10 in!! haha
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Comments (572)
MrsxBillxKaulitz 5
94- you comment made me lol. hard.
iPunchedBigFoot 5
Ya. You're a great person. You know. On the internet. Making your partner sound like he is not enough for you. That's... fun.
cjt1980 2
glad I don't have that problem!!! Get a strap-on .... FOR HIM!!
lidemocr 0
I dated a guy once whose penis was so small that when he was cold it would go back into his body like a goddamn turtle. it was repulsive and so was he it turns out... he tried to rape someone. my friends and I still make fun it. hes a cop now
dfens 8
That's actually quite normal, especially when cold. Stop watching so much ****...ever heard of being a show'er or grow'er? Do some research before you criticize a ex that can't defend himself. ****.
SuperKnuckels 6
haha ******* selfish immature ppl.
perdix 31
The good news: no choking! With such a tiny guy, you can deepthroat him while talking on that big cell phone of yours. Double up on your Kegel exercises so your floppy, overstretched **** can give him a little bit of a squeeze.
ihearthuggybears 0
haha overstretched ****.
chris12400 0
well, the phone vibrates!
jewknowit710 2
looks like he better figure out vibrate mode then! the real question then becomes how long is his tongue! lol
_yarrrr 0
too bad love is so shortcoming ;)
asianive 0
that is pathetic.....