Luna
Carmel, United States
Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
United States
Where did you come from?
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
theapplesleader
Washington, United States
Yucky!
Today, I picked my dog up and nibbled her ear. On the tip of her ear was a large tick, which burst, sending blood into my mouth. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I woke up to find a tick stuck to my eyelashes. The only way I know of to get it off is with fire. FML
Anonymous
United States
Sole music
Today, a thumb tack came out of one of my posters on my wall. The sole of my foot had the pleasure of finding it. FML
Anonymous
Sparta, United States
Today, I went to the Doctor's for a mole my husband had said was, "growing and changing color". It turned out to be a wood tick. My husband knew, but said it was too "icky" to take off himself. FML
triplenipple
Sweden
Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML
anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend told me there was a tick on my shoulder and that he would remove it so I shouldn't worry. After about a half hour, lots of blood, and a ton of pain, he told me it was just a mole. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML
inosehowthatgotthere
United States
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
pierced.
Reno, United States
Ouchies
Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML
Top comments
theslimshadylp 6
I think you should get checked out for lime disease.....
Bluefrog9636 7
I bet that really ticked you off..!... I got nothing... I like nipples.
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Comments (187)
jkmartinjk 16
How did you not notice A TICK IN YOUR NIPPLE?? Now I want some sort of nipple protector...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Thats why "dancers" wear those pasties. To protect their nips. Also, they're sexy.
jkmartinjk 16
No, no, not some starfish on my ****; I want the real deal thing, something I can put under lock and key.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
...Metal bra with voice activation and laser security?
jkmartinjk 16
Jackpot.
OFWGKTADGAF666 6
Actually ive had the same thing with the tick happen same place and everything and I didn't feel it but every other time there was tuck any where else I could feel it.
FYLminerocks 7
Oh come on. Boys have a hard enough time taking off a girls bra. Now it'll never come off.
Grimmerie 31
For some reason I immediately assumed OP lives in NYC and managed to somehow find a tick in the centre of a concrete jungle. Anyway, what I'd really like to know is how OP got the tick OUT of her nipple.
Sawarski 13
OP got it out like you get every other tick out. You balance on your head, while praying to God for mercy.
killingbabyseals 0
I did her a favor and bit it out for her just like I did with your mom! BOOYAH! *gives himself high five*
PrincessPesa 20
Hey 72, what's your address? My mom wants to send you a thank-you note.
BlackBlazeCobra 16
You can get ticks in NYC. My dad used to live in Brooklyn and on occasion his dog would get a tick by walking in the park.
Epikouros 32
Or she could live in Titfuck in upstate New York. (Bumfuck didn't seem appropriate here.)
nightskye 4
I would suggest going to the doctors to have them remove it. It seems dangerous trying to remove it yourself from such a delicate area.
Maysasa 1
That made me sick... x(
petshark 4
Cuuute!
jetsown08 21
Something tells me I'm not the only one who checked their own nipple after reading this.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
The tick loves nipples so much, he wants to live in one.
banan001 6
Hygienic much? try showering sometime
ShyAnn29 15
Hygiene has nothing to do with a tick biting you.
Sawarski 13
Just because OP discovered a tick on their body does not mean OP is non-hygienic. In fact, OP more than likely discovered this tick in the shower.
banan001 6
Ticks live on dirty creatures such as horses and dogs, it's unnatural for a tick to burrow into a human, especially a nipple!!!
Dracoboxer357 36
Ticks also can attach themselves to a human the same way they do to dogs and such: You walk through the woods/bush/tall grass, they hitch a free ride, and they aren't picky at all on how many times a week you showered. I now live rurally, and picking a tick off me is just about a daily occurrence. So's showering. :P
SammyS2012 21
It's unnatural to get ticks on humans? ... What? If you're anywhere with grass, you can gets ticks. Blood is blood; they don't care.
Attica 20
@ 82: Neither of your comments were very intelligent; please learn some actual facts before pointing fingers at other people, in an obvious attempt to boost your own self-esteem. Where do you think people get Lyme Disease from? They bite/bury into humans every day. Ticks don't favour certain creatures because they are "dirty" or clean. Hygiene is irrelevant; like 124 said, "blood is blood". It's the same way it is with mosquitoes; they aren't picky about where their meals come from. Or do you think every person who gets bitten by a mosquito is dirty as well?
s0ulslack 20
Come over, I bet I could suck that little bastard out!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Creeper!
s0ulslack 20
a kind gesture is mistaken yet again, damnnnn the bad luck
talloctopus 7
Ewwwwwwwwwww