Today, I finished my first two weeks as an ice cream truck driver. Now I can't get that annoying ice cream truck music out of my head. It's even in my dreams. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the ice cream truck went by my house for the seventh time today, as it has for the last seven days of my fasting. FML
Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML
Today, I waved money at a passing ice cream truck and it kept going. So apparently I can't even get a date with a Sno Cone. FML
Today, I decided to get back into shape. I went for a jog around my neighborhood. The ice cream truck followed me for my whole jog, mocking me. FML
Today, I finally removed my car insurance after realizing it costs too much money. Since I then had more money, I went to celebrate with ice cream. On the way, I got hit by a truck. FML
Today, I thought it was about time to learn to ride a bike as an adult. I wobbled down the street, lost my balance, and crashed into a parked ice cream truck. The owner yelled at me, and I was left with a bruised ego and no ice cream. FML
Today, after a horrible day at school, I went through the McDonald's drive thru for an ice cream cone. Everything went well until I had to pull a sharp turn. The ice cream is now no longer on the cone, but instead all over my hands, face, steering wheel, and the carpet. FML
Today, after 3 weeks of my new job, I'm already having work-related dreams. I'm having troubles differentiating between the 8 hour shifts in real life and the 8 hour shifts in my dream. I'm doubly exhausted. FML
Today, I had to go down to the county police department to bail out my kids who thought it would be a good idea to try mugging an ice cream truck driver. FML
Today, I saw the guy I've been seeing passing by my dorm. I called out to him, but he covered his ears and crossed the street. Well, at least I have ice cream in my fridge. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Well now you have a reason to scream for ice-cream. The scream of insanity.
ebonyirony 29
Succumb to it! Or feel its wrath. Well ice cream is revenge, after all. Sweet and best served cold. Enjoy.
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Comments (152)
ebonyirony 29
Succumb to it! Or feel its wrath. Well ice cream is revenge, after all. Sweet and best served cold. Enjoy.
Lindahhxd 7
Turn off the music and just scream "ICE CREAMMMMM!!" in the Spongebkb chocolate guy voice.
domking1315 20
But that would only work if he was selling chocolate
innavoiG 9
I always thought ice cream truck drivers going insane from the music was just a myth...
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
I bet every kid wanted to be an ice cream man at least once in their lives
Futacy 30
ba bada ba ba BA BA, BA BA!
JBMcC 7
Maybe if you live in candy-land :)
DerpinaDerpton 8
1- I really like ice cream. I succumb willingly.
Goldenchest 14
Earplugs :)
rahrah765765 11
"mphhehhnn ndth anhhjm" "WHAT KID!?? YOU WANT YOUR DICK IN PRINGLES?!?? YOU SICK...." *takes ear plugs out* "No Mr Ice Cream Man! I said I WANT IT DIPPED IN SPRINKLES!!!"
megamandude455 10
Chocolate? Did you want… chocolate? CHOCOLAAAAATE!!!!!! CHOCOLATE!!!!!! CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!
PinkieKeen 20
I love your profile pic.
Welshite 40
Well now you have a reason to scream for ice-cream. The scream of insanity.
jetsown08 21
He could also scream at the children to relieve stress, that could work too.
Welshite 40
Guy: Hey, kids, would you like some ice-cream? Kids: Yeah! Guy: WELL HERE YOU GO YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!!! (throws ice-cream at their faces) ...I don't think that would go down so well...
MoerGrapeDrank 0
That would be awesome though!!!! Do it. Your choices are either throw ice cream at small children or of them in your meat grinder and drink their life juice. 10 children grants immortality! I am 16 092 years old
buck33 14
59 - I know it was a joke, but that was messed up.
RAUHWeltBegriff 9
Poor op it's only his first 2 weeks... He should go on a ice cream drivers forum and ask how the other long term ice cream drivers cope with the insanity
jetsown08 21
97- An ice cream truck driver forum??? That one actually gave me a good laugh.
nerobluerose 10
I didn't know that had meat grinders 16000 years ago
zandalee 20
Oh yeah. That was when hamburgers were invented... Learn something new everyday!!
RAUHWeltBegriff 9
Yeah there's about a forum about forums these days haha
RAUHWeltBegriff 9
Jetsown08
thisiscat 14
Buy some headphones to wear when you play the music
TrueTriage 16
Maybe see if you can Change music being played from a speaker nothing like some metal or other heavy music to make the kids come running
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Just play "We are the champions" by Queen instead. But be warned you will never get that song out of your head. Seeing Queen in your dreams is just a side effect.
crazydudefrom90s 10
That is not a good idea since he is "driving"
CallMeMcFeelii 14
I wore headphones when I rode my bike (motorcycle not bicycle) around. I live in a very rural area though. Plus when riding a bike you need to be paying attention at all times. The headphones never caused a problem for me. Different story for an ice cream truck driver though I'm sure.
crazydudefrom90s 10
I find the traffic noises helpful at times. Plus the ice cream truck driver is driving around on smaller streets (with the ice cream truck music on) with kids running around and might need to hear the kids scream for ice cream!
saintsrocksocks 10
You can wear head phones, but what happens when an ambulance comes down the street, an you can't hear it!?
Prolux_fml 23
64 - Well then obviously you have your headphones too loud.
saintsrocksocks 10
Well if you can't hear an ice cream truck that you're driving in blasting music through your head phones, you sure as hell won't be able to here an ambulance.
hockeychicl003 6
call me, my dad has speakers for hus bike and he plugs my ipod in, pretty loud haha
courtz94 24
It's a paycheck at least and is better than nothing.
Dunvanation 4
I feel like OP's eventually going to let the music get to him and then he'll become one of the many insane ice cream truck drivers.
bones_17 5
Don't turn into sweet tooth!!
DerpinaDerpton 8
Don't wake up! Ice cream is too yummy.
ThePK 5
Oh Sweet Tooth LOL. I can definitely see an ice cream man turning into him after some time. I wonder if the crazed laugh is natural, though.
kimg0885 23
And you didn't think about this fact during your ice cream driver training camp? It's like your national anthem, you should know it by heart!
olpally 33
Do you get free ice cream?? Because that would be awesome... Also, get an iPod to plug your ears with, but I don't know how much that would help... I'd quit if it's already annoying you this badly.
olpally 33
Ahhh.. The more you know! Glad I learned something today. Thank you for explaining that :)
patrickalamo 48
We eat all we can and sell the rest.
p3mguin 7
To be honest that's not a good idea, because of the kids trying to scream to get your attention, You couldn't hear them!
xZoeAmethystx 12
And that's how they started the ice cream cult.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
ALL HAIL THE ICE CREAM.
Sawarski 13
I was always so excited to hear that music. OP you make kids happy wherever you go with that music.
evilplatypus 39
I could turn myself into a human piñata and bring a lot of people great pleasure; that still wouldn't be a whole lot of consolation to me if I'm getting whacked with sticks. I feel for you, OP!
Calyx_fml 22
10, somehow your comment doesn't quite match your pic.
NothernNightmare 18
9, You were lucky then. Whenever I heard that demonic music as a child, I used to cry hysterically and get my parents to go get the ice cream for me.
evilplatypus 39
82 - If the music freaks you out, you should read "Mister Ice Cold". It's a short, scary story about an ice cream truck driver. It isn't "scary" like boo! "scary", but it's that special kind of creepy that sticks with you and worms its way into your nightmares.
fireheart_fml 14
Your profile picture really made the post :)
porkpiehat 8
Play some Lady Gaga to counter it, that always gets stuck in my head.
MrElephant 5
How dare you.
DerpinaDerpton 8
MrElephant you are eating a cookie. I wish to love you.
arsenicalhumor 30
That doesn't sound like a positive alternative.