Today, I went to an amusement park with a group of friends, one of whom was a girl I really like. When we got on the roller coaster, I was ecstatic that she wanted to sit next to me. Not even half-way through, I ended up puking all over the both of us. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the carnival with a guy I like. When we went on the big scary ride where you flip upside down a lot, he asked me to be his girlfriend. Then, I threw up on him. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster behind a boy who vomited in front of me as the cart shot down. It splattered all over my arm, and a little on my cheek. FML
Today, my friend made me go on a carnival ride. The whole time, I complained that I was going to puke. I didn't, though. She did, all over me. FML
Today, I went on a date with this really cute guy. We were walking in a park and decided to go on the swings. As I was swinging super high up, I threw up. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML
Today, at my local amusement park, I decided it'd be fun to meet someone on the roller coaster by sitting alone and hoping that someone nice would sit next to me. I rode the roller coaster 7 times. I sat alone each time. FML
Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML
Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster and this 13 year old sitting next to me was completely terrified. To cheer him up, I threw my hands in the air. While my hands were up, we hit a curve and I elbowed him in the face, making him cry. FML
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Top comments
dathan 14
Great username :D Also, FYL.
Xathanos 16
Well you just gave her a ride she won't forget..
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Comments (58)
ThisWhorecrux 1
First!
dathan 14
Great username :D Also, FYL.
random_jay 6
Puke... I am your father
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Barf Vomitus would have been better surely?!
danielnieves 4
Lmfao!! That's great. Sucks you. Bet your chances went down the drain
NanillaVipples 2
Judging by the FML I doubt that anyone was sucked that day.
zander4310 5
sucks you?
Sliver1991 26
Hey, do not judge harshly. Perhaps he/she/it is just going with the star wars trend of the first comment? Sounds like Yoda to me.
Xathanos 16
Well you just gave her a ride she won't forget..
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Instead of the ride you wanted to give her, that she won't forget.
bReLiNg 18
Apologize? Give her your shirt! Show off a lil :p
kittytub 12
it probably has puke all over it.
DerpinaDerpton 8
The puke gives it novelty. Their first time together.
kittytub 12
haha, frame it and never wash it. like a trophy.
ManInTheMachine 20
How cute! Instead of a first kiss, you guys have a first barf! Just pray to God your crush is into that kind of thing.
Inheritance 10
If that happened to me id probably cry of embarrassment and leave depressed..
SystemofaBlink41 27
A few days ago I ALMOST barfed on a girl's face ... I can't even stand to imagine what would've happened if I did...
MissMae93 23
Oh yuck. I feel bad for you, OP. Offer your sincerest apologies, hopefully she'll shrug it off!
purpledrizzle 5
Darth Vomitus = Epicness. FYL but your username is completely awesome
matt98_fml 13
If it was the xcellerator, I know what you mean....
hazydaze 9
If she's understanding and cool she will accept your apology. If she accepts it, tell her you want to make it up to her by taking her on a nice date. Just don't puke this time(;