Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML
Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML
Today, I tried demonstrate to my little brother that, unlike what he sees in cartoons, it is impossible to slip on a banana peel. I'm not too sure he's convinced. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, while babysitting my nephew, I was looking through a bin of toys, and I saw a fake spider. I picked it up to do a prank with. It wasn't fake. FML
Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML
Today, I went to pick up my little brother from his friend's house. When I got there, he ran off screaming that he didn't know me. His friend's parents believed him. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I realized that the only boy who ever called me pretty was my 5-year-old brother. My sister then scolded him for lying. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
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Top comments
hotPinklipstick 24
That's the problem with siblings, they joke so much that when you really do have a problem, like a spider on you head for instance, you can't believe them. It's like the boy who cried wolf.
TheEpicMilkMan 13
THEN YOU THREW IT ON THE GROUUUNNNNDDDDD >.
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Comments (98)
vturbz91 0
Your never less then 10 feet away from a spider
vturbz91 0
Every ******* time u see it bitch...
penguin_princess 0
Why the crap does it matter if someone puts 'your' instead of 'you're'!?
julialinn 2
34- they mean two completely different things! Your= shows possesion. You're: means YOU ARE. People are going to butcher the English language so bad that the two your/you'res are no longer a difference.
yummy_richkid 3
45, YOUR just bloody annoying. It's annoying that you feel it's YOU'RE mission to correct everyone's grammatical/spelling errors. I frankly couldn't care less whether or not I spelt something incorrectly or not when it comes to the Internet. This a nonsensical forum only here to provide entertainment and nothing else. You and others like yourself ruin it for everyone. Now please excuse yourself and go crawl in a hole and die. Thanks.
penguin_princess 0
I know the difference between your and you're and I just don't see why people think its necessary to correct people cuz I'm pretty sure that everyone that has been in 5th grade knows the differences..
hotPinklipstick 24
If you know the difference then use them properly. People read it differently when you don't. When I see 'you're' I read it as you are, when I see your I read as a possession like it's suppose to be. Like I said in a past FML, not everyone corrects to be a grammar Nazi, we correct to help you. Unless it's a reoccurring problem from the same person, then we just get pissed and be a bitch about it.
sadistmonkey 19
"not everyone corrects to be a grammar Nazi, we correct to help you" Noble, but I'm sure most people do it to win internet points.
penguin_princess 0
I have read many FML comments where people are correcting others grammar and I'm really annoyed this is an APP for comedy not a language class
alexup24 13
now you know you can trust him
Telxo 0
What a little punk!!
iloveweed69 7
I hate spiders :'((((
TheEpicMilkMan 13
THEN YOU THREW IT ON THE GROUUUNNNNDDDDD >.
kittenvks 11
Op I'd be careful now. My brother would use this against me and start saying it all the time
LeapOfFaith 8
Atleast you brother tells you the truth once in a while. I have a younger brother too. I feel your pain
64ponygirl 1
There's a spider on your head. I'm not up with all the slang lingo, what does that mean? It means, there is a Spider, on your mother f^cking head. Hahahahaha Nothing to Lose.
mistfullkittie 3
Lmao!!
silentblack 0
Spiderman!?
caysters 12
Eww eww eww!!!! Joke or not, I would have freaked the eff out! Creepy little things... *shivers*