Today, I discovered that you can't always assume your little brother is kidding when he says that you have a spider on top of your head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML
Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML
Today, I tried demonstrate to my little brother that, unlike what he sees in cartoons, it is impossible to slip on a banana peel. I'm not too sure he's convinced. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, while babysitting my nephew, I was looking through a bin of toys, and I saw a fake spider. I picked it up to do a prank with. It wasn't fake. FML
Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML
Little shit
Today, I went to pick up my little brother from his friend's house. When I got there, he ran off screaming that he didn't know me. His friend's parents believed him. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I realized that the only boy who ever called me pretty was my 5-year-old brother. My sister then scolded him for lying. FML
He was just chillin'
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Top comments
hotPinklipstick 24
That's the problem with siblings, they joke so much that when you really do have a problem, like a spider on you head for instance, you can't believe them. It's like the boy who cried wolf.
TheEpicMilkMan 13
THEN YOU THREW IT ON THE GROUUUNNNNDDDDD >.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (98)
djsamixin 3
So do you got to be in the' inner circle' to have people answer your comments? Its kind of dodgy and has me wondering wtf? I know I'm not a teenager but figured there was no age discrimination on fml. I'll comment silly and be more ignorantly rude on my next comments. Lol
djsamixin 3
All you ******* morons don't know a damn thing!
djsamixin 3
Hope it bites your eyes and you go blind. Lets see if this gets a response.
djsamixin 3
Some brown recluse notes get mistaken for mrsa
djsamixin 3
^ bites
sadistmonkey 19
djsamixin - False. Their venom is not harmful to humans.
juststoptalking 6
Nah. Myth busters proved it wrong.
Choconumm 8
Stop hitting yourself :D
NAAMxLOOS 11
Boo-motherfucking-hoo, you got a spider on your head. What are you, five?
HooHooHa 6
#89- Maybe OP has archnophobia?
babeeskf 3
Ew