Today, I confronted my fiancé and told him I knew his 'little secret'. I had suspected that he had been ruining his wedding diet by eating pizza at the office. He replied that the affair with his secretary had only been going on for a couple of months. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
Today, I discovered that my fiancé had tried to fake his own death because he thought it would be easier than confessing to the affair he was having. FML
Today, I found out that my husband thinks I'm fat when I caught him slipping diet pills into my morning smoothie. FML
Today, my fiancé invited his pregnant co-worker for dinner. After we finished eating, he sat down and explained to me that her kid is his and that he's been cheating on me with her for 5 months. She had a smile on her face during the entire thing. FML
Today, I saw my husband at a restaurant, laughing with a hot woman. He'd told me he was at a meeting with the VP of his company. Furious, I barged in and started screaming at them, calling him a cheater and a liar. Turns out the woman was actually the VP of his company, and they were in the middle of the meeting. FML
Today, my husband had a 'come to Jesus' moment where he confessed he has been lying to me our entire marriage about everything, from relationships with women I have suspected to what he ate for lunch. He does not know why he lies about the little things, he said he wants to "know something that you don't." FML
Today, I discovered my fiancé has been telling everyone else we are just friends, yet last night he wanted me to go with him to pick up my engagement ring. I'm supposing the wedding will be a surprise to everyone. FML
Today, I found out from some guy that he and my wife had been having an affair for over year. She confessed to everything, and said they had already broken it off. She also admitted that she would've never mentioned it to me if I'd never found out on my own. FML
Today, while trying to be sexy for my fiancé by going to change his background photo to a naughty pic of myself, I found out he's been actively cheating on me. For almost a year, with multiple women. When confronted, he tried telling how hard me finding out was for HIM. FML
Today, I caught my soon to be husband screwing our wedding planner. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nananna915 0
Dump him, dump him immediately
Yulia_fml 0
Thank goodness you found out now! But really, his secretary? How un-original.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (206)
lmmmr 0
I'm not saying your compass is skewed because you maintain non-monogamous relationships, but because you think that someone deserves betrayal and heartbreak because they might have suggested a healthy diet. Regardless of whether you believe in monogamy or not, or even love, you have to believe in honesty and respect. And the value system you're suggesting completely undermines that.
crankpot 0
Honesty? Respect? Surely, you jest. Suggesting a healthy diet is one thing. Enforcing it and confronting a man you supposedly love and respect (even as a joke) because you suspect they were going behind your back is not respectful in any way whatsoever. "Honey, I'm worried about your health" and "You need to lose weight before we get married" are two very separate and very distinct concepts. You don't sneak pizza behind someone's back if you're willingly working together towards a healthy goal. You do it if you are being screamed at by a shrew who wants to show up her high school friends by flaunting photos of her "catch".
edte22 0
Women should know that men HATE when women say stupid little things like this. even tho in this situation the guy obviously did do something wrong, i and many others personally hate things like "i know your little secret" because it automatically gets us worrying even if we didnt do anything.
jessxoxo28 5
omg, i am so sorry wat a dick dump him immediatly
dumbbbb 0
FAKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
lmmmr 0
That's incredibly presumptuous. You are saying that when someone is willingly dieting they follow all guidelines of that diet without fail. By that logic, there would be no obesity. The diet industry makes up a huge portion of corporate revenue in the US for a reason. People always cheat on the diets, even when they are self-imposed. There is no correlation between pizza and bragging shrews. So clearly, the fact that he ate pizza is irrelevant to whether or not he agreed to the diet to begin with. However, if you ignore your entirely unfounded assumptions as to the personality and intentions of the OP, her expectation that he would understand that she was referring to his breaking the diet suggests that it was clearly agreed upon by both parties, and your entire (unfounded) argument that she is a shrew fails. And I fail to see how confronting your partner when you suspect they did something wrong is disrespectful. So, if your argument is really simply that his eating pizza inidcates that she is a shrew, please, try again.
myfairyoshi_fml 0
#12 that was random and awsome XD
crankpot 0
You can continue to convince yourself of your magical intellectual superiority, and I will continue to believe that anyone who confronts their future spouse about the HORRORS OF SNEAKING A SLICE PIZZA deserves every misery she gets. I give up trying to be logical here. **** this nonsense. Congrats, your delusions won over my apathy.
Emwo 0
It's always the secretary... though, if he didn't have any pizza it would've been delicious.
aldpeace 0
Wow. Sorry kiddo. If you decide to stay with him then you are a better woman than me, but I agree with #20. Nothing and I mean nothing excuses cheating but you gotta ask yourself why he cheated on you in the first place.