Today, I came home on leave from a 7 month deployment to Iraq. I wanted to see my girlfriend today, but she needed to spend time with her sick grandmother. As it turns out, her sick grandmother and my cousin are the same person. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got back from a six month deployment overseas. My girlfriend of three years couldn't pick me up from the airport because she had an intramural softball game to go to. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of six months is not actually on vacation with her cousin but is moving in with her fiancé. FML
Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML
Today, while my girlfriend is in hospital, I'm left at home with her mom. What I didn't know is that her mom's medication makes her do strange things. I learned that right away when she took a seat next to me, completely naked, on the couch. My girlfriend's mom is my grandmother's age. FML
Today, my parents left on a trip. I wanted to invite my girlfriend over for a few days so we could spend them together. Then my grandparents turn up, "just for a few days, until your parents return, so you won't be all alone in this big house." FML
Today, I went to visit my boyfriend at work. That's where I met his pregnant girlfriend. FML
Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML
Today, I met my long distance girlfriend after two years of being separated by 900 miles. She brought her short distance boyfriend to the meeting. FML
Today, I returned home from my aunt's funeral abroad to find my boyfriend in bed with my sister, who claimed she was unable to fly due to the flu. FML
Today, my aunt informed me that my cousin's only problem with his girlfriend is that she's not me. FML
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Top comments
Devikarawr 0
wow sucks to be you.... what a mean person. both your gf and your cousin.
ohheykiwi 2
People, she told him she had to spend time with her grandmother, but it was actually his cousin. She was cheating on him with his cousin! FYL, OP. This truly sucks.
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Comments (225)
Powahouse 0
Kill them both. Just kidding, but **** man...that's the worst. You couldn't have explained it any better though. hahahaha
skiBOAT 0
Dude, I totally took this to mean that her grandmother is his cousin and that they're somehow related. Fgsfdsddffs
jaybirdka 0
I hope you kick the shit out of your cousin and that **** catches the clap.
SorchaD 0
So are you distantly related or is she cheating on you? Explain yourself!
soiree_fml 0
Here's hoping you don't let this burn you forever and you find a good woman to stand by your side. Thanks for all you do for us.
fmesideways21 0
Jody always gets the girl.
BadOwner 0
and yet, over 300 people think ydi.
paris78_fml 0
wait .. so you're related? or you got cheated on? i don't get it ..
xxstealthxx 0
what a bitch
cyberhoy 3
YDI for committing incest
MysticCeltic 0
Wtf? Are you really that stupid? L2read!! He said his g/f and his cousin...NO BLOOD RELATION THERE DUMBASS! Btw, FYL OP but YDI for just using her to get laid!