Today, I came home early from work, and caught my girlfriend with my best friend. I forgave her. She thinks it's because I love her. It's because I wouldn't get laid otherwise. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend confessed to me that she'd cheated on me with my best friend. I can't get mad at her, because I cheated on her with him before she did. FML
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML
Today, my wife came home from work early and told me she'd been fired. She was really upset so I told her how much she means to me and how much I love her to help cheer her up. She then told me she was caught getting it on with another employee. FML
Today, at a bar, a drunk girl kissed me, so I went home and confessed what happened to my girlfriend. She forgave me but took it as permission to admit she’s cheated sexually at least once a month for over a year, then got mad I didn’t immediately forgive her like she forgave me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML
Today, my best friend resolved things with her boyfriend after he had admitted to cheating on her. I felt really guilty, because I drunkenly hooked up with her boyfriend last month. She said, "I felt better when he told me that the girl was extremely ugly and bad in bed." FML
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she cheated on me with my best friend. The best part is that I couldn't tell her a thing, because I actually cheated on her with the same friend before. FML
Today, I came home from a weekend trip with some friends, and walked straight in on my girlfriend cheating on me. She burst into tears and began apologizing. Her exact words were "I'm so sorry! I thought you were coming back tomorrow." FML
Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say it when I caught him sleeping with my best friend. FML
Today, I caught my 20 year old daughter having sex with my best friend's husband. Apparently it's my fault for coming home early. FML
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Top comments
sireen 0
you're pathetic.
EvilHippyEmperor 0
Why can I hear The Offspring's "Self Esteem" playing in my head?
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Comments (159)
mattmag 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Meh, I'd do the same, for the same reason.
dearViena 0
that's lame.
mekeskidi_fml 0
No, it's smart. No more commitment. He can always break-up with her later without feeling bad.
mwbddh2 0
Damn straight, any guy would stay with some ass as long as he was getting some.
Duckasaurus 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
No no no no no no. You don't forgive her. You beat her to make sure you stay on top.
cmillertime7 0
Finally, some honesty.
sirfuzzitoes 0
I wouldn't do the same, but that's awesome! You should try to get something more out of the situation, like have your friend give you a *******, just for the **** of it. OR have sex with her mom.
AngryC4t 0
OP, you disgust me. Go die in a fire.
ninja578 0
OP, sounds like your relationship is more of a friends with benefits then anything else... you guys should just call it that and not lie to each other... and it is not pathetic, the couple feels the same way, so there can be no guilty party, no love, nothing to break.
lol123mely 0
well the girl aint better then him. so it goes both ways. i would say the girl deserves it. harsh but still
ShannonBananan76 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
thats not a fmylife its an fherlife for having to be with u
mattmag 0
Ha, I was just kidding. I don't get laid in the first place!
lawls 0
thats EXACTLY why you agree with him , ya hozer. WOOW!, the OP is no better then his girlfriend. you guys are just Fucck buddys
ryguy997 0
so she must be blind or deaf if she bangs you, right?
IMTHEGREATEST 0
So she cheats on him and it's f her life? Oh my god, I feel so bad for her?
Failbuddy 0
that a guy. I would do that also.
laxbro4769 6
Well that escalated quickly...
loooloool 13
Everyone who says op is bad for doing that whats worst cheating with your boyfriends bestfriend or trying to get some sex?
_anonymoose_ 0
FYL
fmh123 0
Wow really, thats pretty sad, and all above me are losers, she gets away this time she prbably will get away another time
genius_man16 1
Agreed. Way to be completely pussy whipped. You are a disgrace to the male gender.
DameGreyWulf 1
Quite agreed. OP, you are a sad, sad man. You've basically told us that you're going to let her sleaze around with whoever she wants, whenever she wants, just so long as she pays your own dick some attention every month or so. There's no "I can't get laid otherwise" there's "I'm a sad, lonely, desperate, and lazy boy"
iljajlm 4
lol well said
ms_nobody 0
HAHA! very well said...there's only real 2 reasons people cant get laid because they are too picky or simply are not trying! in both situations it is the unlaid persons fault! so i dont feel bad for them
cataelophobia 1
he didnt say he was staying with her, he probably kicked her out after he got what he wanted.
Hich17 0
Damegreywulf - ...That's why he said "F my life". See, you're at this website called "Fmylife.com", and ON this website, people post stories explaining why their lives suck.
DameGreyWulf 1
He said "FML" because he says he CAN'T get laid otherwise, but the truth is that he just isn't trying hard enough, or isn't even willing to try. Yes it's true his life sucks, but it's only his fault. Also, there is no real point to your post. What part of my post made you think I was unaware of the site's basic idea? It seems more to me you don't understand it, as you didn't consider the "YDI" part.
Dabamash 0
Haha, good logic. Not really an FML though. Just find another GF, then dump her. Until then, just use her as a human sex toy.
EvilHippyEmperor 0
Why can I hear The Offspring's "Self Esteem" playing in my head?
HeWhoEatsAll423 0
The more you suffer, the more it shows you really care. Right?
Theo_fml 0
Well, not really, since he's only doing it for the sex and, as stated above, for a human sex toy. Thus, he's not suffering at all. He doesn't care, he doesn't love her. However, I don't understand how that's a FML.
zolziski 11
I think the fact that he's certain he won't get any anywhere else is the FML part.
thedoenut 5
I think the line " she says she love me but sleeps with my friends" would go better
jessicax0 0
Thats sad.. Your just setting yourself up to be a failure for the rest of your life..
sireen 0
you're pathetic.
genius_man16 1
Agreed. You sir, are a disgrace to the male gender. Way to be completely pussy whipped.
xilix_fml 0
You go, man. She clearly doesn't love you and deserves to be hurt if she really believes you love her... that or neither of you care if you have sex without love, so now its a win-win for you. Nice maneuvering.
mobius8 0
Meh. It's not that sad. I'd just make it perfectly clear that that's the reason you forgave her.
Cupcake10 0
What a bitch.