Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML
Today, right before a huge snowstorm hit our area, I broke up with my girlfriend. In her fury, she decided to grab my car keys and roll down all four windows in my car. I now have 2 feet of half melted snow in my backseat. FML
Today, I was in a restaurant with my fiancée for dinner. I commented that she had some food around her mouth. She responded with a lecture, then by throwing her hot bowl of noodles at me, before stomping out the restaurant. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. Driving her home, we got stuck in a construction zone. I waited half an hour with with my ex-girlfriend bawling her eyes out in the passenger seat as I watched the traffic lady eat her lunch. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML
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Top comments
WearingHats 14
At least it was empty.
ginnygoggorgon 3
Reconsider your word choices when breaking up with future girlfriends lol
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Comments (110)
ruthlessmofo 0
That's awesome!
Namenlos_fml 20
That's kind of a shady out if you ask me; unless she was relentlessly complaining about how little time you spent together. Then her actions are basically punishing you for responding rationally to her problem.
schalk 12
OP are you f*** mental? Your words " I have a lot on my plate " Her interpretation " you are not a priority to me, you deserve less attention than my menial daily chores "
stoptrying 9
Or OP is one of the many people who are currently juggling a shitty job and school. But supporting himself is real menial, right?
BrandonR1982 3
Now throw the plate back. At her head!!
KiddNYC1O 22
Git r done!
Oliver_Bento 3
Glass on Glass? Or ceramic on glass? Doesn't sound too bad!
ellytoad 13
Are you surprised? You implied to her that she was a disposable burden. May your life be henceforth simpler, easier, and infinitely lonelier...
Sanrio90 8
Not sure why so many people are blaming the OP. If he is not happy in a relationship, why should he stay just to avoid hurting someone else's feelings? I'd say he dodged a bullet there, she sounds crazy. It's one thing to be hurt and upset about a breakup (we've all been there), but it's another thing to resort to violence and property damage. So yeah, FYL OP.
Felling 14
ANGER.
BingleBop 18
You don't break up because you have a lot on your plate: You stay together to help eachother finish the meal.
fwongraven 10
Why are people saying he deserved it? :-S He was being sensible and mature. Sometimes you're just not at the right place in your life to have a relationship. Plus if she's psychotic enough to throw a plate at his windshield, he's well rid.