Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my father contacted me for the first time in years to ask about my upcoming wedding, and possibly walking me down the aisle. He claimed the only reason he left was because he thought I'd be gay. I am. FML
Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML
Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I loved him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, my father lectured me on the “sanctity of marriage” while his third wife bawled in the corner. I'm just gay, not a raging cunt. FML
Today, my friend, who is gay, announced that he's getting married. I implored him to not invite my parents and (especially) my grandma, for reasons that I'm sure you can figure out, but he did anyway. Long story short, he's inconsolable. What excellent parents I have. FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Today, I saw an employee showing off a picture on his phone. I couldn't quite see what it was and tried to inject myself in to the conversation. "Whatcha got there, a cow?" It wasn't. It was a photo of his wife, posing in her wedding dress for the first time since their wedding day several years and children ago. FML
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Top comments
NopeFuckThat 7
At least your wife found it funny :) congratulations on your wedding!
Nilorak 24
And the award for the best father goes to.
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Comments (105)
kder0aeon 9
Wow... what a dough bag. sorry OP.
Mangolian 5
I am sure tat your dad is proud of you just that he dont want to show it
Dopeshit_fml 4
that is hilarious
weveallbeenthere 30
its his loss. one day he will regret not going or even looking at the photos unless he is a complete asshole.
dipshitpoopyhead 7
can you blame her? I'd laugh to If I were her.
HeyItsLeah13 5
Better find a new dad AND WIFE!! Congrats on wedding, woohoo for you!!
horneyhic 15
MzZombie real men have no desire to pose for pictures. Just the wussy teen girl type men do
mybubbles2000 13
Perhaps he shouldn't attend any other special occasions either. Sorry OP & congrats on your wedding.
horneyhic 15
#39 the father was probly there why does he need to see pictures to share the event
frogletts 18
Are you sure you would have wanted him at the wedding in the first place if he was going to act like that? Surely you must have expected a reaction somewhat like that if you spent some of your life living with him.