Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my father contacted me for the first time in years to ask about my upcoming wedding, and possibly walking me down the aisle. He claimed the only reason he left was because he thought I'd be gay. I am. FML
Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML
Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I loved him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, my father lectured me on the “sanctity of marriage” while his third wife bawled in the corner. I'm just gay, not a raging cunt. FML
Today, my friend, who is gay, announced that he's getting married. I implored him to not invite my parents and (especially) my grandma, for reasons that I'm sure you can figure out, but he did anyway. Long story short, he's inconsolable. What excellent parents I have. FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Today, I saw an employee showing off a picture on his phone. I couldn't quite see what it was and tried to inject myself in to the conversation. "Whatcha got there, a cow?" It wasn't. It was a photo of his wife, posing in her wedding dress for the first time since their wedding day several years and children ago. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
NopeFuckThat 7
At least your wife found it funny :) congratulations on your wedding!
Nilorak 24
And the award for the best father goes to.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (105)
1jordan1 11
Lol I know people are gonna yell at me for saying that but before you do realize I have the right to my own opinion and to be into whatever guys I want. Don't be hypocritical idiots.
crankawank 19
You do have the right to have your own opinion. What you're overlooking is that other people have the right to think you and your opinion are awful.
thekidracb 7
this answer is priceless
squarecircles 13
Invite him over for a wine & cheese party.
RedPillSucks 33
With the many selfies of shirtless guys all over the internet, one has to see the lie in that statement. Guys pose for photos all the time. Plus, the wedding photos surely weren't all taken of the groom in poses.
russfml 31
It's another way of his old man saying he doesn't want to feel emasculated doing a more womanly thing. Guys just aren't into looking at wedding photos lol
oatmeal96 10
As a gay man I'm conflicted with being offended by the gay hating yet at the same time I find it a little funny how society has impacted our views/opinions/beliefs.
worldclassrager 41
The key word here is wife...but laugh it off it will mean a longer marriage right and that statement was probably with love
lina21 12
I would laugh for the sheer fact of how awkward that is. Being that there's generally a reason when immediate family members opt out (or aren't invited), maybe this is just more fuel for that fire OP
ckcknight 13
I don't think it was "****" at all. I'm sure his dad didn't either with his son's wife right there. Before the word "gay" became a huge deal socially people (probably only guys) used it to talk crap to each other. It wasn't until I was out of high school that I put any stock into the word itself as meaning homosexual. I honestly think OP is making a huge deal over nothing. Now I do see a big asshole move from the dad not going to the wedding.