Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my father contacted me for the first time in years to ask about my upcoming wedding, and possibly walking me down the aisle. He claimed the only reason he left was because he thought I'd be gay. I am. FML
Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML
Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I loved him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML
Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, my father lectured me on the “sanctity of marriage” while his third wife bawled in the corner. I'm just gay, not a raging cunt. FML
Today, my friend, who is gay, announced that he's getting married. I implored him to not invite my parents and (especially) my grandma, for reasons that I'm sure you can figure out, but he did anyway. Long story short, he's inconsolable. What excellent parents I have. FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Today, I saw an employee showing off a picture on his phone. I couldn't quite see what it was and tried to inject myself in to the conversation. "Whatcha got there, a cow?" It wasn't. It was a photo of his wife, posing in her wedding dress for the first time since their wedding day several years and children ago. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
NopeFuckThat 7
At least your wife found it funny :) congratulations on your wedding!
Nilorak 24
And the award for the best father goes to.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (105)
NopeFuckThat 7
At least your wife found it funny :) congratulations on your wedding!
Exhaling 12
I read this wrong and thought the father called OP's wife a man and she started crying... Then I saw she was laughing... I think I need some more sleep.
incoherentrmblr 22
I hope your wife pissed herself...
tony2win 5
Is that your fetish, 80? Otherwise, wtf.
ClassyCataclasis 4
So his comment would only be ok with you if he has that fetish?
BvbArmy_0 18
Nice to know that OP's Dad would accept him if he was gay -_-
brenton490 19
But if he had said yes he would have to punch a baby animal to recover his manly ness!
Nilorak 24
And the award for the best father goes to.
StillUsesMyspace 22
Well if you insist... I guess I'll accept this award!
Jared900DUmpling 30
....not him. Clearly.
CaptainSmith28 19
The award for best wife goes to...
Tthug 34
It's just not some people's thing. If he went to the wedding he probably would have made a big scene, including calling his son gay. So it's probably best he didn't. And congratulations OP!
TechFire 25
I don't think he would have called him gay. He seems to have meant that he feels that wanting to show wedding photos is feminine.
Mynamewontfi 40
Your dad sounds like such a lovely person.
BananaMan844 4
Yep. So lovely, it's sickening.
miianah1 22
I love your username!
primadonna9396 16
And smart, too. Marrying a woman is SUPER GAY.
leonlee2002 10
That username though
lex1459 38
Well that sucks, but at least your wife gets along with your parents!
ElmoSaysSquishy 28
How does this imply she gets along with his parents. This sounds more like her laughing at the fathers stupidity.
jmfreee 16
It sounds like she was laughing with the dad, not at him.
LowExpectations 30
Your father sounds like a real charmer.
oreyoes 15
Dont even bother to get his attention. He clearly doesnt want to be a part of your family, so leave him out of it. No one likes a douche-dad
horneyhic 15
Or maybe like most men he hates looking at pictures especially if he was there in the first place.
Joisan 20
Except OP clearly states he wasn't there.
bahamut357 16
#56 please reread the FML. OP clearly says his father didn't bother to come to his wedding.
KingRex 22
I wonder how your father feels about HIS wedding photos.
darwinism 30
WTF? Feelings? That shit just ain't right? Keep these sort of comments to yourself.
cakefete2 31
I heard the dad didn't want to see those either. He thought it would be too "gay" to see pictures of himself tying the knot with his lady.
RedPillSucks 33
Maybe dad is gay and was just projecting a little too much.
ckcknight 13
Because guys have no desire to pose for pictures. They have an even less desire to look at pictures other guys posed for.
ckcknight 13
If he didn't come to the wedding, why would you think he would want to see the pictures?
chinaski7628 32
Some people like to share that kind of thing with their family.
I_Am_Melanie 15
Obviously the dad doesn't.
ckcknight 13
Some people yes, but the OP said he didn't bother to go, not that he couldn't go, so he obviously isn't one of those people.
fsomelife 26
Sounds like someone IS gay.
fsomelife 26
Completely honestly, not trying to be a persistent asshole here, just don't get why my comment got moderated (or, rather, should probably have phrased it better): what I meant was that the dad in this FML is attacking his kid and calling his wedding photos "**** stuff" out of the blue, and this odd nervousness makes it seem like he's being defensive and compensating, with something specific. I may be wrong. Anyhow, definitely did not mean to offend anyone.