Today, a long standing fantasy was ruined when the only lasting impression from my first threesome was of how good my boyfriend is at giving other guys a blowjob. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blow job for the first time. He posted it on Facebook and can't understand why I'm angry with him. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped by my house after work because he missed me. We made out for a bit outside, which involved some touching and then he left. When I got inside, I got a Facebook message from my older neighbor that read, "That was gross. Please don't do that again in front of me. Really." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years told me he had feelings for someone else. He also told me he wanted to continue dating me until things progressed further with the other woman. FML
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with the guy I like. He couldn't get it up and awkwardly tried to stick his limp penis in. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally having some intimate alone time together. When we really started getting into it, he suddenly prematurely jizzed in my eye. I now need surgery and have to explain to my family how I almost lost my eye. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML
Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend on our couch. Meanwhile, my parents came to visit us without telling me. FML
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Top comments
nzhx 23
I don't understand why you're so bothered, you're the one that chose to have a threesome? And for those commenting that he's "using her as a coverup" - 1) it was a threesome, a sexual act in which all members interact with one another and 2) bisexuals exist 3) kindly shut the **** up oh my god
BitterSavage 20
Most threesomes seem to ruin people's relationships.
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Comments (161)
StickyPickles 33
Well that escalated quickly
lol_damn_bro 14
This whole comment section is cancer
nodai 13
Simply put, stop whining, you got yourself into this mess, there's a silver lining if you look for it. Or I could tell you: You've opened up a whole new dimension for your sex life!
dragoongirl90 34
Ew! Just... Ew!
Sayeret_Matkal 18
Ew? What's wrong with a little fellatio between bros?
Weasely 11
I don't know, that sounds pretty hot to me.
Dextredlomax02 11
dude gross
lilithfury 23
At least you know yer guy is gay. That's something
michaelw7671 1
Really? You've never been spit roasted? Eiffel towered? DP'd? You're an amateur.
AudiLover21 13
YDI for wanting to have a threesome under the impression it was all about you and your fantasy.
dnissila 10
Well maybe your fantasy should have stayed one. Or had another girl instead.