Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party. After I walked in and upstairs, I quickly and quietly left and went back to the party. I guess my parents decided to have a little party as well. It's called a threesome with my neighbor. They still don't know that I know. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I canceled going to a party with my sisters because I had a secret plan to have a threesome. They left for the party, but soon returned thinking it would be no fun without me. By then we were already making a lot of indecent noise. They heard it all. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
Today, my upstairs neighbor congratulated me on keeping him up 'til dawn with my girlfriend and the chick in the apartment next to us. He doesn't know how I got them to agree to a threesome. Since I was at my folks all weekend, neither do I. FML
Today, I was hard at work cleaning up from a party I had while my parents were out for the night. Not a bottle of beer or a red cup was left for them to find. However, my parents did find two of my friends in their bedroom, still passed out and naked from beer and sex last night. FML
Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said, "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother." FML
Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs. I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex. Afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd also had great sex. FML
Today, my friends were acting strange around me. This afternoon, I got a text asking me to meet them out for a couple of drinks. Because of all the strange acting, I decided to tell them I'd go and then not go. I just found out they had been planning me a surprise party. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, I came home after a party to my parents, who confronted me. They said that my phone had made a pocket call to them and they heard a good half hour of people talking about drugs and alcohol. I confessed at that point. I checked my phone after. I hadn't called them in three days. FML
Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML
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Top comments
kirbyfan23 0
Shoulda stayed at the party. LOL FYL, man. kinky, though.
videogamejunkie 0
Those were YOUR parents?
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Comments (112)
Sunflowerkiss89 0
This was JUST on fml a day ago or so. About the persons parents having a threesome with the neighbor...
zargon 1
Threesomes are more common than you'd think
reapervampyr 0
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew. Why are people calling her a fake just cause someone else had a similar FML? Maybe it is national parents threesome week?
notsocrafty 0
if one is the lonliest number then three is the sexiest number. or 69 is the sexiest.
tpt09 0
Haha you got that right
g00nie 0
wait......you walked in to your parents room? or were they just doing it in the middle of the hallway...
spectre1992 0
Yeah, sorry you had to see that. your mom is a handful in bed, though.
daarlingdamsel 0
Omfg...were your parents not expecting you home??? That is ****** up, FYL for real, that is a memory you will not soon forget and I do not envy you at all...I think I would throw up..
bollocks18 0
haha i love #47s right on!
ryalho 0
0.0
thepunisher_fml 0
whats up with all these parents having threesomes these days?
_Noon_ 0
What's up with all these parents having sex these days?
cmac86 24
that's why you don't sneak out.
zargon 1
Who said anything about sneaking out? I mean, besides that one commenter. In fact, the OP's mention of coming home early seems to indicate that she wasn't sneaking out and that her parents expected her to be out of the house.
djx_fml 0
i think she meant that she came back home, walked in on the threesome and then left