Today, I downloaded Grindr to my phone. It also downloaded to my mom's phone, my dad's phone, and my brother's phone. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while fixing my dad's phone, I saw Tinder installed. He's still married to my mum. FML
Today, while jailbreaking my dad's phone, I found out the hard way that it's jam-packed full of my mom's nudes. FML
Today, my father is really enjoying the iPhone my mother gave him for Christmas. He's enjoying it so much that he's already installed all sorts of dating apps. FML
Today, my dad had gotten a new cell phone. So I started to mess around with the cool features on his phone and stumbled upon some pictures he had taken. Next thing I know I'm looking at my mom going down on my dad. FML
Today, I had to download a parental block so my dad would stop watching porn on my laptop. FML
Today, I visited my mom and siblings. While I went to the bathroom, my younger brother somehow unlocked my iPhone, opened my Twitter app, and sent my parents links to every post in my Bookmarks. Every single one. FML
Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML
Today, I downloaded an application for my phone that reads whatever you type out loud. I started making it say things like "You like it when daddy spanks your tight little ass don't you?" Just as the message was playing back out loud, my mom walked up the stairs. FML
Today, my little brother played my phone, and then accidentally sent a nude photo of mine to our step-dad, and now I have to spend all day with him and my mom on a road trip. FML
Today, I found out that while I was at college, my brother downloaded three terabytes of porn on my laptop and blamed it on me. My parents believed him. FML
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Top comments
Lioness8197 18
Blame it on your brother or a friend when they question it. Just an idea.
Renesaga 8
Alright, so what's Grindr?
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Comments (86)
shaytards_fml 9
you're gay? ew
challan 19
Crawl back under a rock. You should like that he's gay, you can use it as an excuse as to why yet another guy isn't interested in you. I'm quite sure men aren't knocking down your door because of your wit and open-mindedness.
karlcolt45 19
I think/hope she was being sarcastic. even if she was serious, you'd be being just as close minded as she was for snapping at her. none of us have all the answers. best to let people be who they are and leave the figurin' out of it
shaytards_fml 9
#37 being gay is against my religion and men knocking down my door is the least of cares. Thats what you care about the most sweety, so dont stick it on me.
that_band_nerd 22
Well you don't have to be rude just because it's against your religion. it's against mine and I think that gay people are nice, call me a bad catholic but I'm being a good person.
mikbrooke 25
#45 - being gay might be against your religion, but saying 'ew' is being hurtful. and being hurtful is against everyones beliefs, unless they are just an asshole. noone is forcing their beliefs upon you, so dont be so rude about their lives. noone asked you to comment.
shaytards_fml 9
I get to comment and say whatever I want whether you like it or not. you can dislike all my comments, but Im always gunna be posting my opinions.
Wakachulak 22
Challan, there's a knock on your door...
dawnimus 21
I find it interesting that religion is a choice, but apparently some religious people have the "right" to bash on homosexuals and bisexuals whose lifestyle most definitely isn't a choice. I say this as someone who was brought up methodist Christian, questioned it as a teenager and decided there simply wasn't enough proof to believe (my personal choice, not bashing religion). However, I'd learnt the moral values of christianity - tolerance, forgiveness and love, so I was pretty upset to find how many people in the religious community ostracised me for being bi. I can't change who I am, as I didn't choose to be this way. I just am.
mandak1982 3
I'm pretty sure being a judgemental bitch is against your religion too, but it's not stopping you. Judge not lest ye be judged. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
challan 19
you know me so well! Amazing! I'm wondering what your religion is, I'm sure it's not Christian, because aren't you supposed to love thy neighbor? also, your warm hearted profile shows your generosity and caring that God's message send out to the world.
karlcolt45 19
I really regret defending you shaytard. kindness and caring aside, you really turned out to be an unabashed fucktard
challan 19
#54 It was just Shaytard with her bible. Seems I'm going to hell for being friends with homosexuals.
shaytards_fml 9
God has nothing to do with my actions, I choose to be this way. and what you saw on my profile stopped creepy guys from msging me on here. you can have them all
challan 19
Perhaps it's the creepy ones that need the Lord Jesus Christ. Save them!
karlcolt45 19
that's why you added **** off right after you got toasted for your recent comments. these blue eyes don't miss a thing lady
shaytards_fml 9
Jesus didn't save himself, he can't save others :)
karlcolt45 19
don't try to drag Jesus with you now. I'm sure he's pounding his head against the cross just listening to you!
shaytards_fml 9
karl nice stalking skills, I'll add more words later and update you
challan 19
I was under the impression that when you take Jesus into your heart, that you are considered saved. That's how I was taught. of course, I was also taught that kindness and compassion for your fellow man makes the world a better place. Damn my mother for teaching me incorrectly! I'm so glad that I have you to point out my flaws and mistakes on my outlook!
challan 19
He also didn't save himself, and died for our sins... to save us. Fucktard, you really need to read that bible that you're waving around.
shaytards_fml 9
I like how you assumed I'm Christian. There are other religions outthere chatard.
perdix 31
The worst part is that you're going to have to compete against your dad and your brother for attention. For your sake, I hope you're the hottest gay guy in your family.
challan 19
Zoe, I see an FML in your future.
xzeldax3 18
How is it any worse than all the gory video games, **** apps, or fake apps which only have one screenshot? It's just a dating app like Blendr or Plenty of Fish.
mattrd_fml 31
I don't get it. how did it download to everyone else's phone?
tj4234 36
The phones are probably linked through Icloud or something.
Ins0mau 20
They probably share the same iTunes account. Which is a stupid idea in general.
JoJo91_fml 8
the FML is yet to come, wait til your bro & dad make their profiles, they might get hit on more than you! then it would suck LOL
amulya 14
Oh, technology.
arandomusernameaa 20
Technology isn't the issue... especially with apple products which make it obvious how to switch these things off. The fault is users who don't know what they are doing.
amulya 14
Oh I meant iCloud. But yes in the end it's OP's fault for not being more careful, especially with an app like Grindr.
xThatOneWeirdGuy 18
Do people not know how to use google?
Shmatterhorn 38
Looking at these comments, I think not.
ThatFancyPenn 18
Hey, they let a $1000 so get by, why not a gay dating one?
creepyclowntown 10
say it was a virus your phone caught
tj4234 36
If it's an apple then the likelyhood of it getting a virus is very small. Possible, but small.