Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself, "I wish I had a boyfriend like that…" I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was walking out of class when I saw a girl enthusiastically run to her boyfriend, jump on him, and smother him with kisses. I thought to myself "I wish my girlfriend did that." When the girl jumped off and turned around I realized she did, just not to me. FML
Today, I was walking through Target when I was pulled aside by a very attractive girl who began kissing me. She stopped, because I wasn't who she thought I was. Disappointed, I turned around to see her very angry, very large boyfriend behind me. FML
Today, I was walking into my school and I saw two girls kissing. Being a lesbian myself, and thinking it would be cute, I winked at them. I guess one of them had a history of cheating with a girl who looked just like me, because her girlfriend came up and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I was going to walk up to my crush, kiss him, and tell him how I felt. We are already kind of touchy with each other, so I thought he liked me back. I walked up to him and kissed him. He kissed me back, then gently pushed me away. He quietly whispered, "I'm gay." Then walked away. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were downtown when he pointed to a girl and said he wished I dressed more like she did. She was obviously a hooker. FML
Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML
Today, I saw the girl I've been crushing hard on. I go up to talk to her, and I'm immediately greeted by, "I like girls." FML
Today, I was walking along the street and passed a young couple. Over my shoulder I heard the girl say to her boyfriend, "Would you still love me if I looked like her?" FML
Today, I saw an unbelievably cute guy. He caught my eye and began to walk towards me. I adjusted myself and flashed him a smile. He came up to me, smiled back, and said "Hi, do you have a minute for gay rights?" FML
Today, I tried talking to the very quiet girl in my grade. We were having a conversation when a very hot guy walked into the cafeteria. I said to the girl, "The things I would do for him…" She looked at me dead in the eye and said, "That's my boyfriend." FML
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Top comments
livzielove 0
why does justin bieber have an fml account...
TapialPaado 1
Welcome to the wide spectrum of sexuality. I hope you enjoy your stay.
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Comments (205)
thecrazyasian 3
how is this an fml ur not straight we don't need to know
DiamondDrawls 0
cool, so I guess your not straight anymore.
Twistedsoul_fml 0
Ewwwwwwwwww lol gross
heathersmorin 0
his profile says he's gay!
sgtrobswifey 0
So what, it's not like you'll be scrutinized for being gay. If you'd rather have a penis in your mouth, than a ****** in it.. well, so be it I guess. Soon every state will allow same sex marriage, and we will all be one big happy family. -_-
sgtrobswifey 0
Wow really? Guys have dicks?? Women have vaginas?? Obviously if they're ******* together they are inserting these body parts into body parts. ******* dumbass. I wish I could meet you in person. It'd be fun.
DocBastard 40
I'm sensing a girl fight. Sweeeeeet. *pours a pint of Guinness and grabs a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos* No, no, don't stop because of me. Please, continue.
daybowbow 0
There's always Guiness being poured for these girl fights. Can we also take a shot of whiskey everytime one of them bears claws?
sgtrobswifey 0
Well, whatever. Your opinion is just that, your opinion. As is mine. I have plenty of friends and family members who are gay. They're fantastic people, and by no means as ******* ridiculous sounding as you are. Me being in law enforcement, I also have fellow officers who are gay. Just as I don't shove my straightness down their throat, they don't shove their gayness down mine. You're just one of those ignorant ***** that thinks the whole world is out to get you. Just bc you're gay doesn't mean you're entitled to anything. You're not ******* special, you're not one of a kind. Now do me a favor and drink a glass of bleach and let me know how you feel in the morning. PS Your continuous rantings just go to show you're obviously not comfortable with your own sexuality. Dumb ass.
sgtrobswifey 0
Like I said Kay.. GO drink a glass of bleach and tell me how you feel in the morning you dumb ****. :)
killakiwi 1
^Wow a little uptight there.
sgtrobswifey 0
:(
laurabev 9
KaySL - WIN.
Upon_A_Burning_B 0
And the winner is.... KaySl!!
bitheway 2
You kno a lot of big words. Wat does TLDR stand for. And wats a dehumanisation
sgtrobswifey 0
^l o l
Kishaz_Thirteen 0
Lol buddy, you have nothing to worry about. Slip of the mental tongue- maybe you meant to think 'girlfriend'. Doesn't mean you're gay.
CaptainPickles72 18
That's exactly what I was thinking.
karlijn 4
ah well,, if that's who you really are so what? Follow your heart ;)
TheCountess 4
Sexuality is very complex and there are many variations of sexual preferences. Instead of thinking of this as an FML situation, why not think of it as a chance to explore and further define your own sexual identity? There is nothing wrong with you wanting a boyfriend, so why not pursue it if it's something you think might make you happy? If it turns out to not be your cup of tea, you can always terminate the relationship. Good luck, OP.
Fx13mz 7
No ****.
lmaoatall 6
just visit the site joeblow and if you arise to the occasion, just embrace it. the rest will cum naturally. I meant come. damn