Today, I was walking through Target when I was pulled aside by a very attractive girl who began kissing me. She stopped, because I wasn't who she thought I was. Disappointed, I turned around to see her very angry, very large boyfriend behind me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy some new clothes, and I turned around to give her a quick kiss. My lips were half-way to "her" face when I saw instead the face of another lady. She slapped me. My girlfriend was standing next to me, very pissed off. FML
Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my friend when I saw my boyfriend in Victoria's Secret - with another girl. They were joking and laughing, and I was really pissed off. So I stormed into the store and slapped him. He looked up at me with an angry and confused expression. It wasn't my boyfriend. FML
Today, I went to Target with my girlfriend. As we were walking in, I saw a girl in a crop top and leggings walk by us. I instinctively turned my head to look so I could get her rear view. Not only was she flat as a board from the back, my now-ex noticed, broke up with me, and ordered a Uber home. FML
Today, I was walking with my boyfriend when a guy walked up to me and told me I look exactly like Taylor Swift. My boyfriend punched him in the face and told him that Taylor Swift is a lot more attractive. I'm actually considering leaving him for the complete stranger. FML
Today, I was out when a guy walking with his girlfriend eyed me up. I made a shocked face at him and kept walking. The next thing I knew, his girlfriend was beating the shit out of me claiming that I was "the other woman." I'd never seen the guy before in my life. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML
Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML
Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself, "I wish I had a boyfriend like that…" I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
How many of you were drunk and/or high? This hot girl with a very large boyfriend confuses him for a wimpy girly-man? I'm not buying it.
Iamthebanzai22 21
Can you imagine the fight they are having right now? Damn!
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Comments (6)
Iamthebanzai22 21
Can you imagine the fight they are having right now? Damn!
MidnaLink 35
I’m just really hoping he didn’t take any of this out on you… Oh who am I kidding, I’m surprised he let you live to write this.
RichardPencil 32
How many of you were drunk and/or high? This hot girl with a very large boyfriend confuses him for a wimpy girly-man? I'm not buying it.
Smgreene 15
Yeah it was on purpose. To either see your reaction or her boyfriends. There is no such thing as oops my tongue slipped.
Zanquis 22
This is definitely a deliberate action. Either a prank, or just a thing they do so he can prove his manliness to her, or a something she does to make him jealous. Either way you where just a pawn used by her. You should sue/file complaints against her. Because honestly if this was reversed and a guy would just pull a girl aside and start kissing her, he would rightly be put in the back of a police car. Playing such games on anyone is bad period.