Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when I got a sudden agonising cramp in my foot. I cried out in pain, but he didn't stop. If anything, my cries of pain seemed to spur him on. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML
Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Blink_me26 21
Ouch. Maybe save your kink for further down the track OP :P
Welshite 40
Well you might have taken your inspiration too far, given your nickname. Clawing is a special skill that shouldn't be abused. Maybe try a scratching post next time.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (92)
manasstalker 7
Stop using stupid dramas and/or **** video's for references, they both poorly illustrate how sex is (I don't know how else you would think clawing someone up is sexy).
SexyBabb13 3
There are people who like pain... they are called masochists
Mauskau 36
I've never had complaints when scratching someone's back, op must have been very vicious about it and wasn't gentle.
askagimp 5
I love it! bdsm is great!
SuperAwesomeMane 10
Lol
Morgana666 6
I married a masochist. He loves it. First time we had sex he asked me to draw blood. and I did. Maybe that is why he kept me hahaha
thatnucca 36
Go ahead Katy Perry...
olpally 33
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Either you need to file your nails down or he's a wuss. I'm gonna go with the he's a wuss card here. Nails can hurt but not that bad, geeze.
bertyogurt 7
If she's not Freddy Krueger, then he's probably just a pussy.
kozzard 17
You would be surprised olpally...when you have 8 cuts from shoulder to asscrack it hurts like hell, not to mention the sweat that immediately gets into them from sex
gracehi 33
I've drawn blood with my nails. They can hurt. It's very easy to inflict pain on someone, even if you're not very strong.
ericb982 8
Let me viciously claw you're back. We'll see if you still think he's a wimp.
gracehi 33
Perhaps next time you should not dig into him like a lioness on a gazelle.
yeti37 16
Nailed it...
KeepMeWaiting 6
You sir, have earned this thumps up!
threer 30
You, sir, need to shut the **** up and stop thinking that "sir" will make you seem fancy.
1jordan1 11
You lady, need to grow up and stop desperately trying to create a fight on the Internet.
Dcm210 19
That means he is good, he should know to take the pain.
bertyogurt 7
The mood was ruined by his lack of balls. lol.
speakersboom 19
I'm pretty sure it was by his lack of pain tolerance...
skittyskatbrat 19
Um...if you have to deliberately scratch...don't. It's something that happens when you're holding on tight and really enjoying the ride! At which point, NEITHER of you notice it until afterwards. Random mauling? Bad move.
xwolf760x 6
Ya you gotta be careful I never screamed. But def had the mood killed from a girl doing it too hard
Black_Knight80 13
That's tough love right there.