Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when I got a sudden agonising cramp in my foot. I cried out in pain, but he didn't stop. If anything, my cries of pain seemed to spur him on. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML
Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML
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Top comments
Blink_me26 21
Ouch. Maybe save your kink for further down the track OP :P
Welshite 40
Well you might have taken your inspiration too far, given your nickname. Clawing is a special skill that shouldn't be abused. Maybe try a scratching post next time.
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Comments (92)
102fuckyoulane 7
Look don't feel bad. Some guys just don't have the balls to have their girl rake her nails down their backs during sex. Others on the other hand love it and always want more.
yesnid 2
I honestly have no sympathy for OP. She scratched her boyfriend enough to make him really hurt and shout in pain which to me meant it was really bad scratches that probably drew blood. While he was in pain all she cared about was that it turned her off. **** you OP.
ExiledRemixx 13
What a whimp. Being scratched hard with pain is the best part.
kittie77 10
Damn.. You're not trying to skin him! I feel bad for you're bf :( fhl
hantu69 22
*your
Sqourge 0
Are you kidding me!? I've had women rip my back to hell and I have never reacted like that. Jeez.. Your life sucks.
xdanikitty915x 2
Be more gentle ? Some men can hand it harder some can't but sounds like you dug into him hard
worldclassrager 41
Whatever you do do not file those into points...just keep them short or go softer
caramelised 12
you were supposed to be penetrated not him...
Tyler_Posey 18
Maybe your boyfriend is a pussy
Kelnyquist 22
Just want to say that I like being scratched purposely during sex. Personally I like it hard, but maybe for a first timer go for a lighter touch? Just try to scratch like you were scratching your boobs. Light and satisfying. He probably wasn't expecting it either so you freaked him out a bit.