Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when I got a sudden agonising cramp in my foot. I cried out in pain, but he didn't stop. If anything, my cries of pain seemed to spur him on. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML
Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML
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Top comments
Blink_me26 21
Ouch. Maybe save your kink for further down the track OP :P
Welshite 40
Well you might have taken your inspiration too far, given your nickname. Clawing is a special skill that shouldn't be abused. Maybe try a scratching post next time.
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Comments (92)
diamond69_fml 14
Your supposed to do the scratching light enough that it doesn't tear the skin, well unless he wants you to scratch harder. But work your way up to harder, I think you skipped right a bloody good time. lol You also do it when you or him are having an ****** to heighten the pleasure, preferably cumming together if he has the skills to wait and time it right, few guys can hold out.
anthony99 14
God what a pussy
Ben009 13
What a pussy
shorty3313 8
what a pussy
mkayden 23
You're gonna hear me roaaarrrrrr
bubblitious 2
I think that would be super hot if I walked in on my boyfriend jacking off. I would say to give me a show for a while and then jump on.
TcheQ 12
Stop reading trash mags on what is sexy. For the love of the spaghetti monster, don't put your finger in his ass
vincentcloud 4
I have a couple girls do that during sex and one girl bite me on the collarbone while getting frisky. The finger nail thing didn't do it for me, it didn't hurt(yes they left marks) it just threw off my rhythm. The bite however turned me on even more.
icepick23 12
Find a man. Leave that boy alone.
bipitydooiseeyou 6
whimp! that's how its supposed to be done! I guess he's not into that. xD