Today, I was talking this guy I'm dating and stated that the only reason I am with him is because of what he buys me. I was joking. He then responded that he doesn't care because the only reason he is with me is because I give good head. He was serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend of two years saying he only dates me because "sometimes jerking off just ain't good enough". FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
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Top comments
HeyitsPheddy 0
You could break up with him and make a killing in ****.
genius_man16 1
What was the point of you saying that you were only with him because of what he buys you? What a retarded thing to say. YDI completely
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Comments (165)
ziggy123 0
at least you know you got skillz but yea YDI, dumb joke
plexico 4
I'll buy you stuff if you do give good head. If you can work the balls well, I'll buy you GOOD stuff.
rallets 23
you should dump him and come with me
thuryn 2
So... what's you're phone number? Seriously, though, this is another good example of someone's mouth getting her into trouble (in more ways than one!). #24: Saying your were "just kidding" is something we usually get past around the age of 12. You don't get to say mean crap, then say you were "just kidding" and expect everything to be okay. Those kinds of jokes can be funny, but they should be used sparingly, and only when it is *absolutely* *clear* that you're joking. Beecause if the other person doesn't get it, then you're just an asshole, and you have to apologize. The moral is: Use jokes as jokes, not insults and snide remarks.
rallets 23
what the..what happened to my comment..ill just post it again you should dump him and come with me
shaBAMalex 0
LMFAO, 22. Just wowww. OP, YDI completely.
rxxk 0
Dump him and hook up with me.
Blue_Coconuts 7
#16, it's not being insecure, it's called being an adult. That's just a stupid thing to "joke" about, and just shows your immaturity. It's like when people go "Why do you love me?" It just screams how you're not ready for a real relationship. So you have fun dating people who are too immature to have a real relationship. #24, I'd put money the "just kidding" came after his comment.
xHaniffax 0
#10: your comment made me chuckle....I was thinking the same
smileyface11 0
YDI bad "joke" next time think before you say