Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in Walmart with my mom. I was looking for some CDs I wanted and saw a cute guy. Then he nodded at me and as he started to walk towards me, I hear my name being called over the intercom. Apparently, according to my mom, it was time to go. FML
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
Today, my dad showed up at my house and offered to take me to my favorite restaurant. He drove me to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. He believes I only had my daughter, who I love with all my heart, because I drunkenly hooked up with a girl. FML
Today, I talked to my mom about hanging out with her. She got out her phone to schedule an appointment. FML
Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML
Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML
Today, I was getting picked up by my dad after I had been swimming. I saw his car, so I walked over to it, got in and started talking about how I'd seen my brother. It wasn't until after I had put my seat belt on that I realized I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
Today, I had to confess to my mother that I was too hungover to take her to her AA meeting. FML
Today, my brother called me up. He said he needed to talk to me. Whenever someone says that, I naturally I get nervous. He said, "I gave one of my friends your number." I was shocked and asked why. "Your life makes me sad." FML
Today, I bumped into my English teacher at an AA meeting. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
redhedsaysrawr 18
Troll mom is winning
Harpy20 24
Twat swat level: EXPERT.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (138)
NakMuayAdam 19
Well OP, this could be a genuine twat block.... Or your mother could've been saving you from a future mistake. Remember, she's met more than one guy and can probably judge character fairly well. Look back on this at another time, she more than likely saved you.
tj5810 21
I like your moms style.
natalalaliee 9
"Dinner after?"
kayaker83 4
I love your moms sense of humor! That was pretty quick thinking on her part lol
classicpooh4056 6
Boy, mom knows how to bust the anonymity part.....
rsaffi 6
Such a twat swatter!
TacoBelle 8
Moms, the first level of birth control.
cat1230 4
That's pretty funny
miss_sqwert 19
Lmao that is crack up go your mum
babygirl0232 8
OP your mom was just trying to protect you she probably thought that guy was not good enough for you. So be thankful that your mom is protective right now. My mom does that all the time to me but she doesn't say your AA meeting. She just hands me my nephew and says took your son he needs to be changed even if he don't need to be. And I end up finding out that the guy I was talking to was a jerk so my mom saved me from him.