Protective
Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML
Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in Walmart with my mom. I was looking for some CDs I wanted and saw a cute guy. Then he nodded at me and as he started to walk towards me, I hear my name being called over the intercom. Apparently, according to my mom, it was time to go. FML
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
Today, my dad showed up at my house and offered to take me to my favorite restaurant. He drove me to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. He believes I only had my daughter, who I love with all my heart, because I drunkenly hooked up with a girl. FML
Today, I talked to my mom about hanging out with her. She got out her phone to schedule an appointment. FML
Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML
Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML
Today, I was getting picked up by my dad after I had been swimming. I saw his car, so I walked over to it, got in and started talking about how I'd seen my brother. It wasn't until after I had put my seat belt on that I realized I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
Today, I had to confess to my mother that I was too hungover to take her to her AA meeting. FML
Today, my brother called me up. He said he needed to talk to me. Whenever someone says that, I naturally I get nervous. He said, "I gave one of my friends your number." I was shocked and asked why. "Your life makes me sad." FML
Today, I bumped into my English teacher at an AA meeting. FML
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Top comments
redhedsaysrawr 18
Troll mom is winning
Harpy20 24
Twat swat level: EXPERT.
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Comments (138)
happilyever2012 6
I would've been like "Um, this is lady is my mom and she has a condition. You know, a special condition." Ooo!
Kratos1206 3
Haha that's funny.
Shorty777 4
Your mom is hysterical...lol
bmxbikeco 7
Haha just say, "yes I adopted this kid because I work at American Airlines" and can afford it...booyah!!
RachelleMonae 7
LMFAO!!!!!
evebright 5
HAHAHA.... Mom WIN! I have GOT to remember to do this sometime, LOL that's hilarious!!!
bigboyj 3
pwnd
Albixr 8
Wow, what a horrible mum.
baristalbc 18
Bad move on mom's part. Now the guy thinks you put out and like to party.
Bludmagnus 13
Every person on here who think that the mom did a good thing... that is precisely why most of you shouldn't be parents or ever allowed to spawn.