Today, while shopping for dresses, I found a really cute one that fit me really well, but not at all in the breast area. My grandma screamed "buy her some titties!" Everyone in the store looked at me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Tailored
Today, I went shopping with my grandma. Told her I saw a pretty dress I liked. She asked me who would fit in that? When I replied they have it in different sizes. She replied with, "Yeah but definitely not yours.". FML
Unnecessary
Today, my mom and I were looking at dresses for me at the mall. The cashier pointed out a dress, and my mom said, "She's definitely not going to fit into that. She's too flat-chested." FML
Ruthless
Today, I was out shopping for bras. While in one store, I couldn't seem to find any in my size. When I asked an employee for help, they took one look at my chest and said, "Maybe you should try our girls' section, we have a lot of training bras." I'm 25. FML
Today, I was trying on a dress at my grandmother's house. When I posed for her, she told me she would expand the waist, because I won't be sucking in the whole time I would be wearing it. The joke's on you Grandma, I've been sucking my stomach in since I was twelve years old. FML
Stuck
Today, my grandma and her neighbor compared their sports bras in front of me. FML
Snark
Today, my friends and I were shopping for dresses. I asked the lady at the counter for a size 4, she looked at me and mumbled, "Yeah, right…" in front of everyone. FML
Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML
Late start
Today, I was planning on meeting my friend at the mall. She came late, and I was in the dressing room trying on a few things. When I came out to meet her, she looked at me oddly and said, "You shouldn't buy that, it looks terrible on you." Those were the clothes I came in. FML
Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML
Today, I was eating lunch when my grandmother came over and started watching me. Suddenly she said, "I see you're getting breasts". I'm a guy. FML
Top comments
lululatenight 28
I hate when you find the perfect dress and then boom. Society expects you to have boobs!
PaRtTiMeGaMeR 21
Grandma strikes again!
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Comments (119)
PaRtTiMeGaMeR 21
Grandma strikes again!
jipster 11
Why would you go shopping with your grandmother?
evilplatypus 39
Because they're normal and socialize with relatives?
MysticMonkey 9
Troll grandma
isallwaysme 27
sorry to reply to #1, but, we really need an old people category on FML.
jipster 11
#25 my grandma is 97 and i can't imagine to shop for clothes with her, so i was just asking it.
Nightwing98 22
Well not everyone has grandparents in their 90s. It's not like their age is universal.
cmayer 20
Yeah my grandma just turned 60...
PuggieKid 22
CMON FML! Where's the old people category??
spekledworf 18
I think tit was kind of rude of her grandma to say that. But now op knows it's probably not the breast idea to shop with her again.
HKCgrimmjow 15
Not to be insensitive or anything but she practically offered to buy you breast implants, are you really going to turn that down? Because as far as I've heard that's like a 10k surgery
gotaplanstan 28
Better get crackin then 71, you're already behind if you're not a mom already!
lululatenight 28
I hate when you find the perfect dress and then boom. Society expects you to have boobs!
RedPillSucks 33
I hate it when that happens. Call 1800rentaboob. Operators are standing by
ilovedinosawers 17
My life explained in a brief comment.
rocker_chick105 31
Is it just me, or would this comment have been funnier if 2 were a guy...
suboy 10
Couldnt she get the dress taken in. I mean if the rest of it fits perfectly it shouldnt take much to alter.
TheDrifter 24
26, I think you're right. Reading comment 2 in the voice of a disgruntled cpl Klinger (M.A.S.H) makes it much funnier.
Danielle7994 18
I had the same problem. Like I went to Macy's, I tried finding a dress. I found a few dresses that fit my bodice perfectly. But unfortunately, it wouldn't zip up at my chest! I was like "Huh. Maybe, it's just the dress? I mean different companies have different types of sizes, even though the number is your actual dress size." So I tried other dresses, same deal -_-. I tried even a size 13 in juniors (largest size they had!) but it still didn't zip up! My mom was Like "Be glad that you're busty!" (-_____-) Lol thank God for Forever 21! They probably have a better selection and they have sizes that work! You should check it out OP (and any other girls dealing with small/large chests).
Danielle7994 18
OMG sorry. Wrong post >.
wlddog 14
Oh my god I feel like I am dating 51 and I am having to sit through another overly explained shopping trip. I think i zoned out for a while and stared at her chest.
therealafroninga 10
Dang, I can never find the right dress... :(
Danielle7994 18
54, I would never tell my boyfriend that. That would probably torture him. I'm just saying that because I sort of understand her predicament in the sense that it's hard finding the exact form-fitting dresses. I didn't mean to go overboard on the describing. Sorry for doing that.
wlddog 14
No worries 59. Sometimes a little mystery is the spice of life, besides,,, everyone knows even the nicest dress looks best on the floor.
cmayer 20
I have the opposite problem. :( Dresses fit my body but are too small for my boobs. Even trying larger sizes doesn't work. Sigh. First world problems right?
Danielle7994 18
72, -_______- Why do you have to be bitchy?
Danielle7994 18
I'm sorry for coming off as being vain. I was just trying to explain like how it's difficult for girls to try and find form fitting dresses. I then proceeded to substantiate that claim with a personal example. I didn't mean for it to be that long. idk if people noticed my other comments, but I tend to write a lot. I honestly didn't mean to come off as this cocky bitch with an attitude. idk. down vote if you'd like, but I'm being honest right now. I'm sorry for offending anyone. Didn't people read the last sentence? I was trying to offer up advice because Forever 21 IS a perfect place to find dresses for any woman's size
caitlinrawrr 9
72, I have your problem. I always have to find a bigger size because they're too small for my breast area.
Danielle7994 18
82, she's mocking me. That's why she added "first world problems". She doesn't actually have that problem
Calingaladha 21
No...she was simply adding her own example. Pot calling the kettle black, much?
cmayer 20
You want me to send you a picture of my boobs as proof? Not everything's about you, you know. I wasn't even replying to you. I was replying to the person who started this comment thread. I wasn't bragging or anything. I was saying that I have the opposite problem and it IS a first world problem. People who don't have the luxury of going to a store to get new clothes would NOT complain about their boobs being too big or too small for clothes. I could mock you if I really wanted to, but I'm not a bitch or mean and I'm not a drama queen.
cmayer 20
Also forever 21 does not carry sizes big enough for my boobs to fit in that also fit the rest of my body. If I want their clothes to fit my boobs I have to get an XL and sometimes an XXL but then the rest is too big for me. NOW I'm talking to you by the way.
wlddog 14
I hate when I try on a dress, and get funny looks from the people around me. It makes me feel like a piece of meat. Maybe I should do fewer modeling jobs at Victoria's Secret. But their teddies make my legs look so good.
JessicaZado 11
I hate it. I can never find a dress that flatters me everywhere. Especially my chest
poncho55 40
#88, after reading your comments, I feel like I lost so many brain cells that I will never get back.
spikekutter 9
dont buy a dress..
ilovedinosawers 17
DON'T TELL ME HOW TO LIVE.
rg350dx 29
I support this. Females around the world listen up! No more clothing purchases. Live life naked.
kelseythompson 27
#20 you say that now.. then you regret it later when you realize that you'd rather not see most females naked ..
jipster 11
#36 we can always try :p
therealafroninga 10
Why should we let society dictate our comfort. Down with clothes! Except for socks, I like warm toes.
little_one 20
I hate socks! First thing that comes off when I get home... Well it's a toss up between the bra and the socks, although generally I just take off all my clothes the second I get home and put on some pj's.
therealafroninga 10
Can I live with you?
Zen_Mei 17
You gotta admit, grandma has a good sense of humor
maryiah 21
You could always stuff your bra.
RedPillSucks 33
Stuff it with apples... Or bacon! Yeah, bacon...
Ashley_Radke 13
Stuff your bra? Are you 12?
kelseythompson 27
#16 There are 12 year olds with bigger breasts than some 30 year old women, but 12 year olds may stuff, older women may wear chicken cutlets instead ... really there is no difference
adam3650 12
11- you had me at bacon boobs...
SamCat 21
Part of growing up is learning how to dress your body. Don't let a dress or anyone make you feel like you need to change. I had a lot of issues because my butt was always super big even when I was skinny, and they still made fun of me. Dresswear doesn't define us :-)
laden_swallow09 35
So what? I like big butts, and I cannot lie.
rememberkids 14
amen.
Darkmagic666 9
I have the opposite problem. Big boobs suck as well. Dresses are always too small in the chest area
Danielle7994 18
I had the same problem. Like I went to Macy's, I tried finding a dress. I found a few dresses that fit my bodice perfectly. But unfortunately, it wouldn't zip up at my chest! I was like "Huh. Maybe, it's just the dress? I mean different companies have different types of sizes, even though the number is your actual dress size." So I tried other dresses, same deal -_-. I tried even a size 13 in juniors (largest size they had!) but it still didn't zip up! My mom was Like "Be glad that you're busty!" (-_____-) Lol thank God for Forever 21! They probably have a better selection and they have sizes that work! You should check it out OP (and any other girls dealing with small/large chests).
Danielle7994 18
Gah! Idk why I found it necessary to post the same comment twice. Wasn't thinking straight :( So sorry. I accept the down votes.
andyyroxx 20
I think you're getting downvotes for writing a wall of text about how your boobs must be so large.
Danielle7994 18
Oh. I'm not trying to brag though. :(
Danielle7994 18
63, I understand. But I really didn't mean to say that in a tone where I come off as being this bitch that takes pride in having and parades a large chest around. It really does suck, just like the comment that im responding on right now. I Do write a lot in my comments on here. I didn't mean to get carried away. Sure, I'll probably get downvoted AGAIN but I just want people to understand. I'm not a bitchy or mean-spirited person that takes pride in saying things because I'm bettwr than you. I'm actually the COMPLETE opposite. Anyways...it irritates me that even though I apologize, I get downvoted...
iAlissa 34
Well all your comments are paragraphs. It's easy enough to say "Sorry" rather than a novel about boobies and apologies and what not.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
@80 You're digging your own grave here. People downvoted your post on the internet, suck it up-- it's not the end of the world. Nobody thinks you're a bitch or that you're vain, your mile-long comments are just irritating at this point. The more you whine about it, the more you're going to get downvoted. Give it up and accept defeat gracefully.
mn_shr 22
Not trying to brag? You've taken time out of your life to write a short story about your seemingly interesting boobs. Get a life.
therealafroninga 10
Haha, guys take a deep breath, I know boobs are important, but is the argument really necessary. She has big **** that are hard to properly conceal in a dress.
Drifting 21
Gotta loves grandmas honesty lol.
KBurns207 17
Your gramma is a pretty cool lady. You should've said something along the lines of your grandma having saggy boobs. Payback.
onorexveritas 24
oh the elderly