Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML
Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, I was studying for one of my finals that I had later in the week but decided to take a break and play around with my boyfriend in bed for a couple hours. We decided to 69 for the first time, and everything was going great until out of nowhere, I loudly farted in his face. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
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Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Just don't make a big deal out of it. I'm sure she's humiliated enough as it is.
KiddNYC1O 22
She blew you alright.
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Comments (235)
ERRMAHGERD 3
In my defense, it wasn't a fart, it was a queef!!
ChefPhilly 13
I was like " reversed 69?"
laden_swallow09 35
Then it would be a 96.
DiamondSkate 4
That's so hot
Justin0481 5
Queefs are completely acceptable, because generally they mean the sex was good.
perdix 31
That sucks. Don't feel bad -- I doubt many men could maintain an erection after taking a fart to the face. Don't run out and get Viagra, get some Beano for your girlfriend.
LolPieRofl 11
Lol this comment made my day.
Tdrizzzzzly 19
Take Beano before, and there will Beano gas.
MelTheGreat 23
Or lay off on the Del Taco.
Cavebone 5
Some people are into that.
DocBastard 40
Rule 34. NO EXCEPTIONS.
blcksocks 19
Two girls No cup
nerdlyfe101 4
Rule 34?
NagainaFier 16
60; Do a damn google search.
BjgUsername 12
The rule that states if something exists there IS a **** of it
tigerfight23 3
60-Do you even Internet ?
gracehi 33
I knew a girl who told me she would fart uncontrollably during orgasms, but that her boyfriend would eat her out anyway. I told her she should marry that man.
amandajlucas2015 2
Hahahahaha that is some sound advice
Epikouros 32
Thanks, Grace, I guess there's hope for me after all.
Brotha_Lou 5
Lol weird fetishes
jep00 8
Hahaha
darkmis1 18
Why was her butt facing you?
decidedlyvague 11
You don't know what a 69 is do you?
kayaker83 4
Clearly you've been doing 69 wrong lol
MrsPegg 45
Unless this persons been doing it laying down on their side. Then their butts would be facing the opposite way of each other...
theBadGuy37 9
This comment is full of fail. Even if he was just going down on her the fart would be in his face.
MrsPegg 45
After reading 54's comment I feel like a failure lol. Oh well, you live and you learn.
decidedlyvague 11
53, that's a sideways 69. Reverse 69 is the only way her butt wouldn't be directly in his face. There is also standing 69, and some others, but mostly with the butt in the face.
darkmis1 18
I know what 69ing is. I meant why was her butt in his face? Wouldn't her pussy be in his face?
imperfections55 1
-_- do you not know what females look like? the anus and vaginia are fairly close. and if your practicing 69, and doing it right, yes booty would be all up in your face. thats what makes it even hotter.
darkmis1 18
I'm a girl, so yeah, I'm pretty sure I know what my body looks like.
tigerfight23 3
212-then how was this even a question?
graffitied_love 20
Its ok, OP. I don't think you're the only one who can't maintain an erection after being farted on
BloodandIce 11
You'll never be able to do that again.
havesomehope 6
ouch!