Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML
Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, I was studying for one of my finals that I had later in the week but decided to take a break and play around with my boyfriend in bed for a couple hours. We decided to 69 for the first time, and everything was going great until out of nowhere, I loudly farted in his face. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
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Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Just don't make a big deal out of it. I'm sure she's humiliated enough as it is.
KiddNYC1O 22
She blew you alright.
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Comments (235)
yeti37 16
if you were positioned correctly, your nose should have been the cork in the bottle.
notforbirds 9
I don't think you were doing it right...
ellytoad 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's it? I'd be incapable of holding my vomit reflex down.
RedPillSucks 33
and you'd have a convenient hole to put it in. what? too much?
BananerzFresh 12
She had the scaredy farts.
Marrach 7
I don't know what that exactly is supposed to mean on your behalf, but it was something that made me laugh.
gregkingsley 4
Nobody likes a cup of chili during sex
adrimarie23 4
Guess the full course Mexican dinner was a bad choice!
Deirdre_Curry 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
OMG THTS DISCUSTING!!! LMFAO!!!!!!!
pickles1994 18
Disgusting*
xXxIracebethxXx 14
That's*
duckfan4life 1
I doubt any guy could keep one if that happened to him
KiddNYC1O 22
Haha, Bitch.
duckfan4life 1
I didn't even realize that! Must be destiny...
thefella 10
Not gonna lie I scrolled down to see who had comment 69
knoxxx 22
Lmfao that's terrible. Poor girl, she's probably mortified. Awkward sexual encounters can leave awkward emotional scars.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
When you're south of the border that's always a possibility.