Today, I received a friend request from a boyfriend I hadn't talked to in 20+ years. A few minutes later, he messaged me a picture of himself with a young woman at a strip club. My daughter. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I received a text from a man my wife had an affair with, in which he stated that my 18 year-old daughter is biologically his. He then sent me pictures of her that my wife had sent to him. FML
Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML
Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML
Today, I found out the guy whose ass I used to routinely kick in high school is now dating my 19 year-old daughter. FML
Today, I was sitting with a friend who moved back into town, and he told me about how he hooked up with a girl at a bar last night. I asked him if she was hot, he responded "Yeah, I have a picture of her on my phone." It was a picture of my girlfriend. FML
Today, my two year-old opened one of my boyfriend's Snapchat messages. It was from a girl I've never heard of, with whom he has a 700+ day streak and is one of his top friends. The message said, "I wish?" FML
Today, my recent ex-girlfriend posted a photo of herself on Facebook. It was a picture of herself in the arms of a half-naked male stripper. She posted it on my wall. FML
Today, my mother got a call from our old high school saying that they had fifteen freshmen boys in his office with a nude photo of me on their phones. I had sent that photo only to my boyfriend. Apparently he loves to share me. FML
Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML
Today, I was at a bar with my friends for my 19th birthday when I saw my dad grinding some chick that was not my mom. I confronted him and told him I was telling mom. He then pointed across the bar to my mom with another man. I just found out my parents are swingers. FML
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Top comments
EsotericAura 25
So is he dating your daughter; is she a stripper there; or did he just happen to run into her there?
One_In_Three 24
Time to get a shotgun!
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Comments (69)
One_In_Three 24
Time to get a shotgun!
URBeingLied2 23
That makes sense.
Zanquis 22
For what? You dont know enough info to start shooting people.. Cause u cant shoot a guy just because he sees your daughter in a stripclub... Cause if that is the case, remember ever stripper is someones daughter, that would justify shooting every body who goes to a stripclub. Seriously these stupid shotgun comments cannot be downvoted enough.
Miss_Whipped 43
We could say the same about your comment, #45.
bickdig69 8
Oh the irony bout the down voting part
atomkraft 5
It's a joke not a dick, don't take it so hard
kzinn11 1
Oh my godd
burgersnchips 8
She's not his is she?
fitnessgram 19
talk like yoda you do?
SecundusSecunda 27
I thought Yoda would say it more like: Not his she is, mmmmmm?
burgersnchips 8
A reason not to, I cannot see.
ThrottleJockey 36
For about $100 she's his for 20 minutes or so.
TheOneButNotOnly 15
This is quite the story.
MissMayLaw001 21
Hmm....
EsotericAura 25
So is he dating your daughter; is she a stripper there; or did he just happen to run into her there?
brinnablaine 22
Seriously, a follow up is definitely necessary here. We need answers!
Felling 14
So many questions, so little answers..
PurpleMyth 28
I'm thinking that he is the stripper
thejonac 21
i would really like to see a follow-up on this OP
aruden 25
Well that's kind of ****** up
ThunderLightTSV 31
Oh. My. Lord. ..So OP, who's ass you gonna kick first?
blairiofosterio1 10
Sounds like you've been stripped of your dignity