Today, I sent my boyfriend a dirty picture to turn him on. He texted back: "Jfc, why wud u tease me like that?? Srsly fuck off". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I was feeling a little racy and decided to send my boyfriend some naked pictures of myself. He responded, "That's OK, but does your face have to be in them?" FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a naughty pic. I then asked him if there was anything else he wanted before I got dressed. His reply? "No it's fine." FML
Today, I finally felt ready for intimacy with my boyfriend, and I sent him a sexy picture of myself topless. He texted back, "Ewwwww." FML
Today, I tried to send my boyfriend a sexy picture. I took a close up picture of my face, and, trying to be sexy, had my naked body reflected on a mirror in the background. First thing he replied was, "Who the hell is that guy in the background?" FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Today, I tried turning on my boyfriend by sending him naughty pictures and texts, describing in detail all the things I was going to do to him when we have the house to ourselves this weekend. He responded by quoting that crappy movie 'The Room', saying, "Oh hi doggie!" FML
Today, I was feeling really down, so I texted my boyfriend, hoping to get some emotional support. He texted me back twenty minutes later, asking for nude pictures. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML
Today, I sent a scantily clad pic to my boyfriend, to which he responded "Nice, but please clean your room". FML
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Top comments
17031990 20
Were you upset that he told you to **** off or because his spelling was so bad?!?
thatkid00117 16
No good deed goes unpunished.
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Comments (94)
SpicyDuck 22
It least it sounds like he liked it (; (The picture, clearly not being teased)
_Patrick____Star 8
Next time send a clean picture instead of a dirty one. Wishy Washy Scrub a Dub Dub.
cornyrob 33
Yeah, it's like someone sending you a picture of a steak while you're starving.
thatkid00117 16
No good deed goes unpunished.
Steven696 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Now he's probably got awkward wood in the workplace. That's the worst
FBellesLife 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
FYL OP, or... **** his? Maybe both.
17031990 20
Were you upset that he told you to **** off or because his spelling was so bad?!?
Dlzq 22
Lol, he just abbreviates the words, not the same as the way he'd actually spell them.
glabberfasted 16
"Wud"
xxreikoxx 31
I'd have been upset with both...ugh! I'd have dumped him on the spot as well. FYL, OP.
hard_candy 25
if I ever have a boyfriend who tells me to **** off, I would literally do just that because he would not be my boyfriend anymore. but I don't see why everyone is slaying him over his spelling. it's normal to shorten words when texting. you can pretty much still comprehend the fact that he's a dick who is probably gay for turning down OP's sexy visuals.
kerstileann 26
So if a guy doesnt want to be bothered by sexual pictures he's gay? That's just plain stupid, he was probably at work or doing something where he cant be seen veiwing a naked woman. Doesnt mean he's gay.
kerstileann 26
oops *viewing
hard_candy 25
34, of course not! you missed my attempt of a (bad) joke.ever heard of the fable where the fox could not reach the grapes and so assumed they were probably sour anyway? sort of the impression I was going for.
nevm 12
Wtf kind of fable is that everyone knows the sour grapes are the best grapes
hard_candy 25
Aesop's fable.
orbit 22
Aesop rock?
crandel 11
Using shorthand is hardly the same as not knowing how to spell. Before smartphones, that was how everyone wrote texts.
laden_swallow09 35
Only if you have a lot to say and trying to fit it all into one, 160 character SMS message are you allowed to use txt tlk. Otherwise, you have no excuse to not spell it all out or forget punctuation. It just looks unintelligent.
Roxy1620 5
There's no pleasing some people...
Dlzq 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's a perk girls have, you can tease us. Use it.
cadillacgal79 32
Unfortunately you have a couple of *****....from what I've heard through my grades grapevine, one of them was walking around school (after hours, there was a basketball game) in a pair of pretty much non existent shorts and what she called a "sports bra".
minesbiggerr 25
I should hope not
nevm 12
Then you've obviously never been to Southern California
isabellasimone 18
What, he should be happy you sent one at all!
YoursAlways98 13
Wtf? Guess he didn't get your foreshadowing lol
FrozenMusic 26
That went from 100-0 real quick
Sports_guy3 28
Oh. Shit. That just made my day.