Today, I had to bail my boyfriend out of jail. He got arrested because he was tugging his man-meat in the drive-thru at a McDonald's. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML
Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML
Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, starting to get intimate with him, when one of his friends walked into the room, grabbed my leg, and pulled me onto the floor. His reason? He was hungry and wanted to go to McDonald's. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML
Today, my boyfriend went to jail for a DUI. In a panic, I rushed to go bail him out. On the way to the jail I was stopped for running a red light. I soon joined my boyfriend in jail with my very own DUI charge. FML
Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML
Today, I got to drop off my boyfriend at his newest place of residence: jail. FML
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Top comments
Tuesdaythe10th 11
McManMeat
bigdude1302 2
So tell me....does he have a Big Mac or a double cheese burger?
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Comments (107)
klx125cross 9
That's sucks..... But it is kinda funny
rinkagamine_fml 9
OP HAD to bail him out? No, she chose to bail him out. Maybe if people would actually suffer the consequences of their actions instead of getting a reprieve from their significant other or parents every single time, they might actually stop being so stupid. Might. No promises.
Malevolent_Bunny 0
Let him stew for a while. He doesn't seem to have a problem performing for an audience, maybe the time alone will let him work it out of his system.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Get out now while you can.
graphicstyle7 17
Time to give up and move on to better things.
tom526 10
Dump him!
andtay 0
I assume that's the first real piece of meat that they'd seen.
trippythehippy 6
They ran out of special sauce
DivineSunshine 1
You should have left him in jail. He is a loser and a freak. He is going to end up on the sex offender list for that little display.
skyeyez9 25
I wouldn't have bailed his trailer trash ass out of jail! That is nasty to jerk it in public.